The Gift of Waiting

December 4, 2010

Maria Peace, Prayer, Psalm 40 , , Leave a comment

Ps 40 :1-3  I waited patiently for the Lord.  He turned to me and heard my cry.  He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud & mire. He set my feet on a rock
and gave me a firm place to stand.   He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God.

**

I’ve been waiting a long time for God to act in my husband’s life about a particular need.  He’s always felt frustrated with work. He hasn’t found a place YET where the fit was good, where he could blossom, grow and contribute in a way that brought him joy.  Nonetheless, he has continued to work hard, amply providing for our family.

So I have prayed for years and waited, watching expectantly.  I have learned how to pray, how to nurture that humble attitude that commands us to cast all our cares on the One who loves us.  As I have matured during this wait, I have practiced casting those anxieties back onto God.  My prayers for my husband have grown very specific, that by this provision of an appropriate job, God would open rivers on bare heights, bring dead bones to life, turn his gloom into noonday and exchange mourning for joyful oil.  And I wait, patiently.  Through years of learning to pray, trust and wait for God to reveal His solution, my confidence in Him has grown.  Here is how that has transpired.  And I think this may be one benefit to waiting.

While God tarries in this situation, I am encouraged each time He DOES answer prayers among brothers & sisters in Christ.   I am blessed to be attached to a church family, part of which is Calvary Reformed Presbyterian Church in Hampton, VA and part of which is the wider body, the near and far-flung Christian friends & family.  I hear answers to prayers on a regular basis.  Each time God acts in someone else’s life, my faith in Him grows deeper.  He IS who He says He is.  He DOES act according to His word.  Hallelujah!

Even though our verse of the new song hasn’t been written yet, the larger choral number is nevertheless being assembled as more and more Christian friends are pulled out of their own pits.  And I keep my voice warmed up to sing that hymn of praise about our particular need.

Evidence of empty pits

  • Recently conceived triplets for a couple who has prayed long & hard
  • A teacher to fill a school vacancy.   The 2 ladies who did double duty to ‘cover’ that class have kicked off their shoes to dance the King David Jig
  • A recovered West Point ring for a friend’s son
  • A reconciliation and warming among two elders in another church
  • Business leads and contacts beginning to come in for a young entrepreneur
  • A report of ‘no more cancer’ for a student’s mom
  • A friend’s change in medication that has made a big difference in chronic fatigue
  • A local job and promotion for a student’s dad when he was going to have to move away
  • Deployed friends’ safe returns
  • The miraculous arrival of an unpilfered container to missionaries in Africa

Each time God answers one of these prayers, I rejoice and my resolve to ‘hypomeno’ (persevere, abide, endure with joyful patience, hold on TIGHT) grows.

I know that God has our best interests at heart, even if that means that He doesn’t answer this prayer the way I have asked.  Thus I can rest in the fact that we have the God of Jacob, the Lord of Hosts sovereignly at work in our lives.  Surely the lessons learned in the process are priceless treasures.

And speaking of treasure, in closing I’ll quote a curious verse that is growing dear to me:

Is 33:6 – And He (Yahweh – the Lord) shall be the stability of your times; a wealth of salvation, wisdom and knowledge.  The fear of the Lord is your treasure.

This fear of the Lord refers to a CORRECT view of God and thus treating Him as He is: sovereign creator and Lord of us all.  When we begin to value and love God for who He is, then we begin to realize the treasure we have.  Who would not want to be in the correct relationship with the Creator/Artist who designed and chose us?  Since we are His creation, He will ensure that we fulfill the purpose for which He designed us.

Be at peace.

 

Following my own advice when discouraged

November 16, 2010

Maria 1 Thessalonians, Attitude, Faith , , Leave a comment

Rejoice always, pray continuously and in everything give thanks, for this is God’s will for Christ. 1 Thess 5:16-18

“What’s good for the goose is good for the gander”, so goes the folk wisdom. Only in my case, what I’m preaching to my gander, I need to follow myself.

My beloved is depressed due to a job he can’t stand and much uncertainty surrounding it.  He feels stuck because he needs to endure 3 more years in this job to qualify for a small pension from the government.  His body reacts with physical symptoms due to his dark gray feelings. His body’s response deepens his depression.  It feels like a vicious circle.

I spend time searching scripture to encourage him with God’s word.  Verses like:

  • Ascribe to the Lord power and strength  (i.e. don’t build up the circumstances and make them seem insurmountable)  (Ps 68:34)
  • But as for me, I will look to the Lord and confident in Him I will keep watch; I will wait with hope and expectancy for the God of my salvation; my God will hear me! (Micah 7:7)
  • Though the fig tree does not blossom….. (my version – though life is REALLY HARD right now)….yet will I rejoice in the Lord.  (Hab 3: 17….19)
  • As a man thinks in his heart, so he becomes (Prov 23:7)
  • I can do ALL things through Him who strengthens me (Phil 4:19)
  • I pray that the eyes of Mike’s heart may be enlightened in order that he may know …….. his incomparably great power for us who believe. That power is the same as the mighty strength 20 he exerted when he raised Christ from the dead. (Eph 1: 18-19)

But when my husband doesn’t respond to my encouragement, I can fall into feeling down too!

But wait a second!  I’m being two-faced then.  Who am I to succumb to my feelings?  If I am called to be my husband’s Ezer, his companion to help him, then God has equipped me.   I don’t have to battle his depression on my own!  I don’t have to let it bring me down.

If I’m encouraging Mike to change his self-talk, then I need to listen to my own advice.  I need to talk to myself, tell myself Truth from God’s word and not listen to my feelings which are based on incomplete knowledge.  I need to rejoice that God has given me the power to encourage Mike.  Paraphrasing Paul in 1 Cor. 15 “I worked hard…yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me!”  When I feel weak like I can’t summon up any more encouragement for Mike, I MUST tell myself the truth. I don’t have to succumb to discouragement.   Yes there is trouble in life, but Christ is with me to fight on.  I might not sense that I have the resources or energy to be an encouragement tonight, but I CAN trust God that He will provide manna for the evening, not now, but IN THE MOMENT.  “As is my day, so too is the STRENGTH, the REST and the SECURITY that God provides” (Deut 33:25) I can count on Him to provide manna in the moment.

Putting on my belt of truth and lifting up my shield of faith in Christ to ward off the fears and doubts with which the enemy so delights in barraging me.

“Your faith has saved you; go in peace”– or whose faith is it?

November 9, 2010

Maria Faith, Forgiveness, Luke Leave a comment

First some context : Here is the tail-end of Jesus’ remarks in Luke 7:50 to the Pharisee who invited him to dinner      Then he turned toward the woman and said to Simon, “Do you see this woman? I came into your house. You did not give me any water for my feet, but she wet my feet with her tears and wiped them with her hair. You did not give me a kiss, but this woman, from the time I entered, has not stopped kissing my feet. You did not put oil on my head, but she has poured perfume on my feet. Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven — for she loved much. But he who has been forgiven little loves little.” Then Jesus said to her, “Your sins are forgiven.”  The other guests began to say among themselves, “Who is this who even forgives sins?” Jesus said to the woman, “Your faith has saved you; go in peace.”

I’ve been learning about what faith is and what it is not.  In the above story one could commend the woman for having faith.  After all, Jesus refers to it as HER faith.  Something she possesses.  But did she originate the faith?  Should she be praised for something that she stoked, nurtured and exercised in seeking out Jesus?

What would we think of a person who enters a marathon in a wheel chair and completes it entirely thanks to someone who pushed him?   Would we say, “Congratulations!  Your fast finish has qualified you to place!”

No, we would clearly see that his finishing the race was entirely due to this other person.

So it is with the faith of the ‘sinful’ woman.  This pistis (Greek) or faith was given to her by God.  That is what regeneration is, what being born again is all about.  It’s when God opens our eyes and ears and deposits faith in our soul.  Then we can see the need and feel the compelling desire to repent; then we can feel safe in approaching Jesus.

What is remarkable is that since WE ourselves don’t generate this faith, we don’t have to fear losing it.  It is a gift placed in us by God. Furthermore, He deposits the Holy Spirit in us, to assist our use of that gift.  If you have faith no bigger than a tiny seed, it is enough.  Imagine nuclear power and the miniscule fission process that spontaneously occurs.  But the outcome is huge.  So it is when God makes us alive, gives us faith and provides the Holy Spirit as a helper.

I’ve been meditating on Jesus’ prayer to His Father in John 17.  He commends the disciples as those whom the Father gave to him and men who obeyed God’s word.  We quickly think of Peter and his denial of Jesus and the brothers James & John who were concerned about their right-hand positions in the Kingdom and the fearful group in the boat faced with the threatening waves.  Do these actions qualify as obeying God’s word?   Of course not.   So what could Jesus mean?

I think Jesus is referring to the fact that the disciples retained their faith.  They continued to believe that Jesus was the Messiah, God’s son.  Their actions didn’t always comport with the behavior one would imagine of a proper disciple.  But in God’s book, they were men of faith and that is the grid through which He judges us.

But….it’s a rigged system!  We can’t possibly fail!  God gives us faith.  He gives us supernatural help, guaranteeing our success exercise of it.  Finally, He commends us for keeping this faith.  It’s a win-win situation!

There’s a verse in Jeremiah 31: 6b where God promises His people that, “…. your work will be rewarded……”    We have the best deal possible.  What God requires of us, we can’t possibly fail to do, because His constant resources, although invisible, are a guarantee that we will please Him.  On top of His approval, He will also reward us.

The supreme work we are to do for God is to believe Him, to exercise the faith with which He gifts us.  All else is subsumed underneath that raw trust.  We have to get the order correct.  Believe, rely on Him and do what He commands, trusting that He will enable us to please Him.  We can’t measure the outcome and determine if we have pleased Him, if we have exercised faith ENOUGH (whatever THAT means!).  But we can trust that what warms His heart and makes Him rejoice and beam as a proud Father is our toddler-like stabs at faith. Picture Him applauding us for walking in faith while our hands are being held by the Holy Spirit.  Selah!

The pain and blessing of discouragement – or where is that abundant grace?

October 27, 2010

Maria 2 Corinthians , , 2 Comments

2 Cor 9:8 – And God is able to make all grace abound to you, so that always having all-sufficiency in all things you may have an abundance for every good work.

This is my 3rd year teaching one particular French class and I have let this class color my school life. I live with daily discouragement.   When I teach their class, I feel inadequate as a French teacher. It’s partly because of their personalities and partly because I have not yet developed sufficient skills with TPRS® (teaching proficiency and reading through story-telling), the foreign language methodology I use for French.

They are a quiet group of students with little inclination to use their imaginations. Their lack of participatory energy makes my skills all the more necessary to carry the class.  I feel like a stand-up comedian whose jokes fall flat.  It’s uncomfortable.  My French 1s and 2s are very imaginative and eager to create stories.  It’s easy to work with their momentum and interest.  We play a mutual game, this tossing language back and forth.  Class with those two levels is productive and satisfying because the burden is shared.

My daily negative evaluation and self-talk is ongoing.  But so are my prayers.  My verse this week has been Paul’s encouraging words meant to assure us that we risk nothing by sowing a lot.  If we sow much, we will reap much, because it’s God who causes the increase.  Let me assure you that I sow plentifully and pour myself into this class and still feel pathetic as a teacher.

I’ve been talking to God a lot these days.  My conversation has been something like the elder brother – “Lord, I’m working really hard, reading what other practitioners write, trying new things and I’m frustrated. I pray continuously and acknowledge that I am helpless and needy.  You know that I have limited time and can only invest so much into lesson prep.  I’m offering the widow’s mite, the 5 loaves and 3 fishes, depending on you to make it be enough.  I’m not even asking for leftovers.  Just make what I have to offer be enough!!!!  Why don’t you help me?  It’s not fair!!”   I can be VERY whiny!!

But this morning I had a glimmer.  Something worked well in French 2 and I saw how I might be able to apply it to French 3.  Could it be that God is letting me just stew and struggle against the waves and find my way?  I don’t want that.  I want the rough waters to part. I want smooth sailing.  I want to feel like I’m a competent teacher with skills that always work.  I don’t like living like one of those salmon struggling to make her way up stream.  I don’t like being the caterpillar pushing against the cocoon.  In short, I don’t like on-going flailing, depending on God and waiting for His help.  But maybe more is at stake in my struggle than just feeling comfortable with my skills.

This morning I was reading in Charles Spurgeon about a time when a heaviness would not lift.  He had been feeling despondent and finding no sin to repent of, he wondered at his depressed state of mind. He repeatedly asked God to restore to him a state of thankfulness and joy.  As it happened, a very troubled man came to him for help that Sunday after services.  Because Spurgeon had been feeling so empty, he was actually able sufficiently to identify with the man’s feelings and offer him Gospel hope.  Now he saw why God had allowed him to remain discouraged.  He would not have been able to connect as well with the miserable man who sought him out.  Spurgeon’s conclusion was that sometimes God causes us to feel a certain way for the benefit of someone else.  If we belong to Him, we should submit to however God chooses to use us.

So, dear Lord, I will labor on and trust that you know what you’re doing with me and this French class.  May your will be done!

How to use Logic to make a decision

October 21, 2010

Maria Attitude, Thinking , 1 Comment

There’s a meeting I SHOULD go to, but I don’t want to.  And I feel guilty.  What to do?

As I was pondering this, I started thinking about why I feel guilty?  Doing so brought up some pre-suppositions that actually govern my life.

Since this is my 4th year of teaching (i.e. learning) logic to 8th graders, it occurred to me that I ought to flush out these unspoken major premises and see if they are legitimate principles for making decisions in my life.

What kind of meeting is the one I am angsting over?  A monthly women’s group.  The focus for November is to pull together baby scrapbooks for new moms from the Crisis Pregnancy Center.  Most of these brave mothers are financially strapped and providing a partially-started book is a tangible way to show love.  What a great cause!

Here are my selfish reasons for not going –

1)    I don’t like going out at night once I’ve come home from work

  • It means rushing dinner
  • It means missing an evening discussion with my husband
  • It means missing out on prized and precious reading time

2)    I don’t like doing crafts

3)    This is optional: I have no particular role to fill accept as attendee

So why would I go? – Here are some reasons

  • People expect me to attend
  • I like people to think well of me
  • I feel guilty when I don’t do what people expect of me
  • What people think of me is important to me

So my syllogism looks like this:

Premise 1 – I should do what I imagine people expect me to do

Premise 2 – I imagine that the women of the church expect me to attend

Conclusion – Tf, I should go to this meeting

*

If the above syllogism is sound (valid in form and true in its two premises), then why don’t I use that same reasoning for serving in the nursery?

After all, I did serve once.  I didn’t like it.  I haven’t been back and  – yet – I don’t feel guilty.

What is the difference?  I think it can be found in premise # 2 – I don’t imagine that the women of the church expect me to do nursery.  But the women’s group is different.  I attended most of the monthly meetings last year and haven’t since July, all for reasonable conflicts.  But I don’t have a conflict this time.  I just don’t want to go.  But the leader of the group and I interact occasionally.  There is no one with the nursery with whom I interact on a regular basis.  So I don’t feel ‘accountable’ to any particular person.  But this gal is different.  I know I would miss out on an occasion to encourage her in her service.

Hmm, now that I have thought this through, I actually want to go.  I want to go in order to support the sponsor of this group.  And that is a positive reason, not a reason born out of guilt.

Here’s the new syllogism

Premise 1 – Attending events in order to support and encourage the leadership is a good reason

Premise 2 – I can support this women’s ministry by attending in November

Conclusion – Tf, I will attend in November

 

About God’s glory – what I learned on my school’s retreat

October 12, 2010

Maria Acts, Attitude, Ephesians, Psalms, Uncategorized , , , , Leave a comment

Psalm 19:1-2

1 The heavens declare the glory of God; the skies proclaim the work of his hands.

2 Day after day they pour forth speech; night after night they display knowledge

So whose glory are you intent on displaying?  Whose knowledge?  If nature purposefully magnifies God, why don’t we?

These are questions I ask myself daily.  For over a year, I have been painfully aware that I am more interested in communicating my talents and my uniqueness, hence ‘my glory’ than I am about making God look good.  Yet my daily prayer is, “Give me this day Lord, an opening to say something that makes much of you”.  Rarely, do I achieve that.  Now, to be truthful, I pray in the morning and then the rest of the day I fall back into my natural thought patterns of wanting someone to find me fascinating and ask me about my life.  Yes, I am well aware that this is pretty pathetic and also sinful.  I am stealing God’s glory.  After all, the reason you & I are alive is to glorify God.  So daily, I am NOT fulfilling my God-given purpose.

Last week our school, Summit Christian Academy, dedicated 3 days to an off-campus retreat.  The schedule for teachers and 7th-12th graders included community service, outdoor activities, free time, a talent show, games, small group time and a speaker.

The pastor’s theme was something to do about living a radically different life.  But God’s theme for me was, “How NOT to Rob God of His Glory”.  I was primed.  The young man from Lynchburg spoke for 3 one-hour sessions and it was in the last 10 minutes of Session 3, that God gave me specific insight on how to accomplish my heart-felt prayer.

The text was Acts 19: 13-16.  There were seven sons of a Jewish priest named Sceva.  These sons were exorcists who had observed Paul invoking Jesus’ name and driving out evil spirits.  They tried to copy Paul, although they were not believers.  At one point during an exorcism, a demon spoke out, frightening the seven fakers.  He said, “Jesus I know, and I know about Paul, but who are you?” And of course, these startled and petrified men fled, leaving their very clothes behind them.

The pastor’s point (that God tailored to me) was that as long as we have our own agenda and are living for ourselves, we are NO threat to the spirit world, the world of demons. In fact, we are like the seven sons of Sceva, totally unknown to Satan’s minions.  Self-absorption, therefore, is a guarantee of totally ineffectiveness on behalf of the Kingdom of God.  I will add the other SELF-sins:  SELF-RIGHTEOUSNESS, COMPLAINING, WORRY, SELF-PITY, DEFENSIVENESS.  You get the picture.  As long as we are just about ourselves, we are certainly not glorifying Jesus.

But, if we realize that by our living for God’s glory, we can ‘stick it to the spirit world’ as the pastor put it, we are fulfilling our purpose.  When we don’t complain amidst difficult circumstances, we are a threat to the dark side.  When we are praising God for who He is, when we are praying, when we are patiently waiting year after year – in faith for God to work in someone’s life, we are taking a stand for the worth of God’s glory.   In short, when our thought life is so immersed in God instead of in us, we are confounding ‘the spiritual forces of wickedness’.

Paul is explicit in his letter to the Ephesians when he says that our fight is not against flesh and blood, but…..

We are ….contending against the despotisms, against the powers, against [the master spirits who are] the world rulers of this present darkness, against the spirit forces of wickedness in the heavenly (supernatural) sphere.

As you can see, this pastor’s words during our retreat were the practical ‘how-to’ I needed to actively glorify God instead of Maria.  What is SO encouraging to me is that in light of what my purpose is and equipped with these concrete steps, I can now see how every day matters.  There doesn’t have to be any such thing as a wasted day, no matter how my personal ‘stuff’ goes.  Problems, setbacks, failures as well as successes are ALL occasions to wait, thank God, trust Him and pray.   I can also encourage someone who is flat on her back in the hospital or constrained in a nursing home that her life also matters, no matter her physical limitations.  One’s good attitude matters, one’s prayers for others matter, one’s good cheer matters, and how one spends her waking hours DOES make a difference in God’s kingdom.

So thank you Pastor Matt.  I, too, will enjoy opening my eyes each morning and imagining the spiritual forces of darkness grumbling, “Oh no, she’s awake!”

 

You live where your thoughts go

October 3, 2010

Maria John, Life, Peace, Thinking , , Leave a comment

Remain in me and I will remain in you.  No branch can bear fruit by itself; it must remain in the vine.  Neither can you bear fruit unless you remain in me. (John 15:4)

You live where your thoughts go.  Jesus says that the only condition for having life is to be in Him.  How can we be in Him?  The only interpretation that makes sense to me is that we are in Him to the extent that He occupies our thoughts.  I live in my head, with my thoughts.  Most of the time, my thoughts center on me.  It’s no wonder I get bored, if my thoughts are about Maria.  Where’s the life in that?

But do we have control over our thoughts?   Well, we certainly can exercise will power and thereby replace thoughts that are not life-producing.  God did give us imagination.  If I don’t like a thought I’m having, I can choose to think about something else.  And the more emotion and color I give that replacement thought, the more real and powerful it becomes.  If you’re like me, you do this very naturally when you imagine how good some ice cream or a piece of chocolate will taste. Pretty soon desire builds and you can almost taste it.  I can even start salivating and justifying why I deserve that ice cream.  See? We DO have the skills.

I heard Robert Rayburn from Faith PCA in Tacoma talk about pride in a podcast sermon.  When we’re thinking about ourselves, whether how clever or how sinful we are or how uncomfortable our circumstances are, that is pride.  Our only way out of the incessant pride, is both to focus on and actively love God and our neighbor.  We have got to get away from thinking about ourselves.  Now if I connect that idea with the scripture above, I see that LIFE (i.e. energy, abundance, joy, anticipation, satisfaction, peace) only comes to the degree that my thoughts remain about Jesus.

And here is the bonus – Paul even tells us that if we cast on Him all the self-things that concern us, God is sure to give us His ‘eirene’ (Strongs # 1515)- His peace/bliss/blessedness.

This, dear ones, is a no-brainer:  Think about oneself, get bored  versus Think about Jesus, get life.

God, give us the grace to redirect our thoughts.

May God’s bliss (eirene) and life (zoe – Strong’s # 2222) be with us all.

Letter to a son – what we failed to teach you

September 28, 2010

Maria Faith, Gospel, Peace, Sanctification, Thinking , , , , , , Leave a comment

Dear Son –

Dad and I were so blessed by your phone call last night. Your transparent accounting of what you struggle with at age 22, both as a newly married man and a recently commissioned Infantry lieutenant, convey trust and love for us and a longing to grow.  These two changes in your life are major, in and of themselves.  Together they provide a lot of stress; even if they are circumstances you have chosen and for which you have mentally prepared.    You’ve faced difficult challenges before, since you’ve been a Christian for 6 or so years and have experienced pruning and growth. But new developments have peeled away a comfort layer and revealed more sin for your Father to address.  Your attitude and reaction to some of these feelings raised have caught you by surprise.

The way you described what God has been teaching you was well articulated.  It’s not a first-time lesson nor is it unique to you.  The choice before all Christians is to walk/abide in our human flesh or to walk/abide in Christ.  The first choice is more comfortable because we have developed personal coping mechanisms to deal with daily unpleasantness.  The second option works far better, but either doesn’t always occur to us and/or doesn’t appeal.  Our pride/stubbornness leads us to default to the shortcut, even if we can accurately predict the outcome. We are used to failure, self-condemnation, our own excuses and concomitant spewing over onto those we love.

Here are some observations from your parents who are 31 years older than you.  However, we have really only been growing as Christians for the past 10 years.  So you, your brother, Dad and I are really about the same age as God’s Kids.

Dad and I DID NOT teach you the following: (we have been learning these realities ourselves in recent years, since you left for college)

  • The reason we were born is to glorify God.
  • The nature of life on earth is brokenness and  warfare
  • Because of Christ in us, we can have purpose and joy beyond measure, but they have NOTHING to do with comfort or circumstances.  They have to do with the Cross.

First – the purpose of life is to glorify God.  Relentlessly, the world tells us that life is all about us.  Hear the constant litany – “our comfort, our desires, our bodies, our accomplishments, our purposes, our stuff, and our rights.”   We have to intentionally choose to live moment by moment, breath by breath for what magnifies and makes most of God, not what exalts us.  John Piper exhorts us not to waste our lives on ourselves, no matter how much we beguile ourselves with our own self-worth.  Self, self, self!

Second – because of the Fall, life is hard.  Because of Satan, we are in a war.   John Piper calls us to adopt a warfare mentality.  That’s not bad.  You were mentioning that a good soldier always has a plan and is prepared to fight.  Our enemy is not just terrorists from another land, fellow humans.  All they can do is kill us.  Our real enemy is far worse. He can deceive us into believing that God doesn’t exist, or in inventing our own version of God, made in our image.

So even though we Christians know how the story ends, we have to be alert and on guard.  The American dream in both the active working years and in retirement is a major ploy of Satan’s.  He has lulled us into thinking that this life is all there is and we had better enjoy it.  Meanwhile, he is behind our lines as a 5th column, beguiling the ‘innocent’.   Be mad!  Get righteously angry, but not at fellow humans, but at the Father of Lies.

My 3rd point is worth more discussion than I have time right now.  But I don’t think you need convincing of the possibility of lasting joy and purpose in Christ.  We are comforted and assured by God’s Word that, even now on Earth, we have eternal life.  Furthermore, God be praised, we are blessed with brief glimpses of joy even while wearing these perishable bodies.

Yet, as your chronologically older sister and brother in Christ, KNOW that this painful lesson of choosing to abide in Christ, rather than working out of your flesh/ your dominant side is a lesson you will have to RELEARN, time and time again.  I’m sorry to tell you that.  Were it otherwise!  But that’s reality here on Earth.  I still struggle with complaining and a poor attitude. I have to be pulled up short, daily.  I’m even doing what I love, teaching French.  Still I grumble, because of lack of perceived comfort, time, and choice circumstances, all the ME- desires.  Your father is blessed to sing with a quality chorus as a hobby.  He still struggles with the insidious temptation to work alone out of his own strength, thus experiencing frustration or to be yoked with Christ and enjoy rest.  How simple the choice seems with distance.  How blind we are.

So be prepared to fall again and again. We thank God for your wife, a godly woman who loves you and will hold you accountable.  And you will do the same for her, when she fails to remember the way life is.   Repentance is a blessing and the Father’s arms are never shut.  Fly to him frequently.

Love,

Mom & Dad

Wedding Feasts – Matthew 22:2-14

September 20, 2010

Maria Isaiah, Matthew , Leave a comment

I’ve attended two weddings this summer and still have a couple more to enjoy in October.  Weddings are great fun, especially when you know both bride & groom as well as lots of guests.

So I was delighted to read Jesus’ likening the Kingdom of Heaven to a wedding feast.  In his scenario, it’s the King who has invited people to celebrate a son’s wedding.  I can imagine how privileged the guests feel.  What if I we were invited to a royal wedding, to include a sumptuous reception (a sit-down dinner with all the courses) in elegant surroundings at Buckingham Palace?  The anticipation would be half the fun.  I would want to share my good fortune with all my friends, find the perfect dress, and set up hair and nail appointments.  Looking forward to this event would be enough to minimize daily frustrations or ‘sufferings’. I would be able to say, “Well, no matter, I still have the wedding to look forward to!”

So when Jesus says that being part of God’s family entails a personalized invitation with a luxurious feast to follow, that makes eternal life very tangible and appealing. Who doesn’t like weddings!

What is astonishing is that on the day of the wedding that Jesus describes, no one shows up!  The guests have all RSVPd according to etiquette.  But now they stand up the host.  Not only are they extremely rude, they show appalling ignorance by their willful refusal to attend. Don’t they know what they are missing?   Furthermore, some guests even kill the staff sent to escort them to the dinner.  It is difficult to understand how these guests, handpicked to witness a royal wedding, could react this way?   Had they lost their mind?

What is now frightening for the original guests is that their actions (some are indifferent, some are murderous) permanently seal their fates.  There will be no more chances to change their mind and attend after all.  The guest list suddenly shifts.  The ‘wrong crowd’ is now invited.  Surprisingly, they gratefully respond.  Jesus refers to them as a combination of ‘good and evil’ people who are totally unsuited to such a high-class celebration, but invited nonetheless.  Why they don’t even have a proper dress, or an elegant suit and they certainly haven’t bathed, or so the hoi-polloi would think.  But the King has everything covered.  He has his staff provide them each with a new outfit, certainly not one they would have been able to afford themselves.  (‘come buy wine and milk, without money and without cost’ – Isaiah 55:1)  Once they are dressed appropriately, they fit in perfectly to the royal surroundings.

The King finally arrives to survey the wedding hall. But there is a minor problem.  He immediately spots someone who evidently provided his own wedding clothes.  The King addresses him gently at first “Friend…how did you get in here with the wrong outfit?”  But the words are cutting.  This man is incredulous that his host would think he didn’t belong.  After all, he was wearing what he thought were appropriate wedding clothes.  Not only is he thrown out, but he is forcibly escorted to a horrid place.

Jesus’ parable has two main points as far as I can see.  Yes, there is a warning against thinking that we are worthy to attend the celebration.  We can’t come in our own clothes, trusting in our own worthiness.  But what I will take away, more than this reminder of my humble position, is how wonderful the reconciled life with God is.  Think of the best party you ever attended, the one that was better than you had anticipated.  Being a child of God is better than we can ‘ask or imagine’.  So be of good cheer.  Even when things at work or with our family don’t go according to our own particular plan, we can pull out our wedding invitation and do some anticipation.  Our spirits will lift and that will give us the courage and strength to carry on until the party is ready to begin!

Costly Complaining

September 13, 2010

Maria 1 Thessalonians, Colossians, Philippians , , Leave a comment

Phil 2 : 14, 15 Do everything without complaining or arguing…. That you may show yourselves to be ….. children of God…. in the midst of a crooked and wicked generation ….among whom you are seen as bright lights ….in the [dark] world.

1 Thess 5:19 – Do not quench the spirit.

School started 3 weeks ago and so did my complaining.  I wasn’t aware of it until I read Oswald Chambers on August 30th.  He said that where we are in life is where God has purposefully flung us.  He continued his point by saying that our circumstances don’t matter; it’s our reaction that counts, that we fulfill God’s purpose for us as long as we walk with him in the light and don’t quench or suppress that light.

This startled me in several ways.  First, I hadn’t been aware that I was complaining.   So my first response was to acknowledge how much I had indeed been grumbling, inside.  Second, after some reflection, I did see how the circumstances of our lives are just the background, the scenery.  How we respond is the main action or event.  Finally, I was led to see that EVERYONE is watching to see how I will react to unpleasant circumstances – the spirit world and humans, both other believers and non-believers.  Much is at stake by how I respond to the circumstances.

God kept shining an uncomfortable light on my poor attitude which was turning out to be a spirit of inner discontent, dialogue and criticism of how things are. (It shouldn’t be that I have to ……).  Once God brought this to my attention, I repented of course.  That’s the end of that, I innocently thought.  Wrong!!!  I continued to winge.  For 2 solid weeks.

And my joy evaporated as did my peace, my thankfulness and my love for others.

In fact, today, during Pete’s sermon at church, I realize that when I complain about the present or worry about the future, that ALL my fruit rots. (Galatians 5:22, 23 – …..Love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control.)  Thank the good Lord for the gift of constant repentance and forgiveness.

While Pete preached, God further showed me that when I’m in a stinky state, I don’t look any different from a pagan.  It’s the NORM to complain when things don’t go our way.  When Christians DON’T gripe, then they stand out as VERY different from the general population.   Our ‘light’ can then be an entrée or opening as a witness to what God enables us to do because we’ve been born anew.

One other costly consequence of rehearsing one’s dissatisfaction and frustration with circumstances is that we cut off the power of the HS in us.  Mike used to have a motorcycle.  When his gas tank would run empty, the bike would shut off.  Technically with the littlest of motorized bikes, one can pedal.  I picture our grumbling like an automatic shutoff valve.  In essence God is saying, “Maria, you don’t like where I have placed you?  You think you should be somewhere else or be doing life a different way?  Have at it, WITHOUT the power of the HS.  Pedal that motorcycle all you want, in your own strength.”

No, Lord, I repent.  Come back HS.  I need you every minute.  Help me catch my thoughts before I start to be negative.  Nothing is happening to me that you haven’t planned for my own good.  So I can relax and trust that I have all I need to walk in your power, in your name, even in circumstances I don’t like.  I can even thank you for what you are doing in me with your power.

Paul stresses this point twice to the Colossians:

3:17 – And whatever you do, whether in word or deed, do it all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through him.

3:23-24 Whatever you do, work at it with all your heart, as working for the Lord, not for men, since you know that you will receive an inheritance from the Lord as a reward. It is the Lord Christ you are serving.

Amen.

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