There is an appointed time for everything. And there is a time for every event under heaven— Ecclesiastes 3:1a

In our project to go through every area of our house evaluating what to keep, donate, and sell, we are now reading old letters from each other as well as correspondence I wrote to my in-laws as a newlywed stationed in Germany.  My dear mother-in-law kept all of them as well as those from Mike’s first year at West Point and his time in Ranger School.  

Seeing my sinful, selfish attitudes evidenced in weekly letters I cavalierly wrote to Mike’s parents—accounts of daily life— has been hard to take.  But God’s sovereign timing of our pastor’s sermons has salved my shame.

Joe is slowly preaching through the book of Ecclesiastes.  Each Sunday he examines Solomon’s account of all he experienced as king, bringing God’s light to these chapters and offering us applications that are altering my thinking and life right now. 

We have all read many times how Solomon denied himself nothing as he set himself to investigate and pursue worldly knowledge, wealth, creative work, sex, food and travel.  What he purposefully labeled as activities performed “under the sun”, did not reference the God he actually knew.

Sunday’s message from our pastor provided the gentle push I needed to doubt no more God’s sovereign directing of every single event in our universe. 

Opening our eyes to the Hebrew term “zeman”, misleadingly translated in the ESV as “season”, Joe suggested that, based on its usage in other passages, “appointed or set time” serves us better.

He then built a case that every event, every circumstance that meets us, is determined by God—something that I already had accepted in my head.  What was new to me was how I could apply this beautiful doctrine to my heart in a way that is still in its infancy.  

For instance, I have been reading old letters, revisiting past failures through a new and freeing lens.  My poor morals in college, long ago confessed, need not shame me any longer. I have been forgiven and covered by Christ’s blood at the Cross—though Satan has gotten practiced at accusing me over and over again about my sin. 

Sunday night, I lay awake worrying about something, projecting onto the future old patterns of interacting. But I did not beat myself up for holding on to that anxiety.  I simply told myself and Mike: “God appointed that sleeplessness.”  And I let it go—but not without first extracting a lesson about past mistakes having no prescriptive power over an upcoming visit with family. With this kind of freedom, I can ask for forgiveness easily when I hurt someone.  I do not need to fear “failure.”

I feel as though I am tiptoeing into a new life of freedom and light.  Yet, I am not immune to the pain and suffering that I and others cause. Tragedies of great magnitude abound.  God doesn’t call them good but He uses them to conform believers more to Christ. 

One shining example comes to mind: the life and illnesses God has ordained for Joni Eareckson Tada’s life. Her infectious joy and ability to bless our God for her wheelchair, cancer and its recurrence model this joyful acceptance of God’s appointed events. 

As Mike and I face upcoming air travel which often causes us anxiety, I feel better equipped to hand over the outcome to God, knowing that I can trust my good Father who is all wise.