New Year, New Goals, New Format

January 12, 2025

Maria Galatians 2, Hebrews 10, Philippians 4 , , , , , , , Leave a comment

I’ve switched to writing short devotional-sized reflections. Occasionally, I’ll post two of them here on this blog. Happy New Year!

….let us go right into the presence of God with sincere hearts fully trusting him …..Hebrews 10:22 NLT

After Joe’s sermon on Sunday about how to abide in Jesus, I read John Piper’s Solid Joys reflection on this verse.  He called it a ‘command’! That startled me, for sure.  I never have viewed it as a command. But I can’t tell you why not, given that I know enough about other language grammar structure to recognize it.

Had the writer meant to exclude himself, he would have said it this way:  Go straight into the presence of God!  But he includes himself, ‘let us go’.

Why did this grab my attention?  Because Joe had mentioned that when we obey God, we are abiding in Jesus. Usually, I picture obedience as doing something difficult.  But this command is like:  let us eat our chocolate after dinner, something altogether enjoyable.

Could it be that I could view other commands as delightful?  How about:

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Philippians 4:6 NLT.

More to ponder and try out, for sure.

****

My old self has been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me. So, I live in this earthly body by trusting in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20 NLT

Oswald Chambers always gets me thinking. As I read his devotion, I picked up my pen and started writing to figure out what was packed into this one verse.

Here goes my version of Galatians 2:20. According to God, my illusions of who I am died on that cross with Jesus.  That Maria no longer exists. (Although at times I forget and start thinking like her.) A new Maria lives because of Jesus.

When did that happen? At the point when God opened her eyes to see Jesus for who he is, Holy God, and to see that Maria, selfish sinner, headed for eternity separated from God.

Since then, the new Maria is to by faith, depending on the Son of God who loved her by yielding himself to unrighteous, evil authorities in obedience to his Father. Jesus died on the cross instead of Maria.

The cross remains a picture of the judgment that would be awaiting me were it not for Christ taking my place. In the cross, I see what I deserve as well as the love of God for me.

I’m trying to keep one eye forward to follow Jesus and the other eye back on the cross to remember what would have been my destiny. 

Help for a worry addict

November 8, 2024

Maria Meditation, Philippians 4, Prayer, Renewing, Sin, Thoughts, Trusting God , , , , , , 2 Comments

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things. Philippians 4:8 ESV

I’ve resolved to attack this sin of worry any way I can!

That is not a new decision, but one that dates decades back to when I became a Christian in my early twenties. Sadly, as motivated as I can be, I have easily slipped back into that well-worn groove of pondering and stewing over current situations and feeling bad.  Yes, despite having ‘given them over’ to Jesus.

You see, I simply forget that I am cutting a new path through the wilderness, this jungle of my thought life.

To help me, I realized yesterday that I should PRAY early in the day, asking the Holy Spirit to help me remember my true desire.

This morning, he brought a device to mind, a resource that  might just be what I can use to not forget my resolve to kill this sin.   

In his letter to the Philippians, who apparently were believers prone to worry like me, Paul offered a path for our thoughts after we have handed over to Jesus what weighs us down. It’s a verse I memorized some years back.

I excitedly turned to Philippians 4:8 thinking that just maybe there were seven topics offered on which I could focus my thoughts in lieu of stewing.  That would be cool if there were seven, the number of ‘completion’, allowing me continuously to cycle through one a day.

But there are eight. 

I googled, ‘significance of the number eight in the Bible’. And voilà, up popped this gem of an article spelling out the wonder of eight.

It turns out that eight communicates ‘a new beginning, order or creation’.  How cool is that!  The author relates at least 10 different places in the Bible where 8 is meaningful.  Mentioning just one of the early ones, eight people on the arc were saved out of the flood.  You should read the rest of examples in Scripture.  As a teaser, David was Jesse’s eighth and last son.

Do you remember how Paul exhorts us to be changed completely by renovating our minds, by changing our thought patterns?   The Bible declares that we are new creations. But just as we are considered forensically or legally righteous in Jesus since believers are covered by his blood, we still have to grow into what we are in practice.

Today, waiting in my physical therapist’s office for my time slot, I shunned my phone, choosing instead to use today’s Word, “true” and meditate.  I started to think through all that I knew to be true. I had time for about 15 facts before Phil called me back. Such truths as:

  • I have a Father
  • He created me on purpose
  • I have worth in his sight
  • He is sovereign over every detail of my life
  • He IS handling my needs and my requests

Not only do I need a daily focus, if I’m to direct my thoughts away from what I have handed over to the Lord, I want also to use the daily meditation focus as a way to sift my thoughts.

Here is how I see this filtering tool. From early this morning, I was armed and ready to clobber any thought threatening to sink me with the help of my shield. Before I let a potentially enemy though get close to me I was ready with a probe: Is that thought TRUE? 

I pray I can get practiced at remembering and challenging myself as I protect my new path of God-honoring thoughts. If you think of me or run into me in person, please feel free to ask me what my pondering focus for the day is.  Or call me out on a comment I make that dishonors, condemns, or isn’t true, lovely, right or praiseworthy.   

Can you be passively active?

May 29, 2023

Maria 2 Corinthians 5, Ezekiel 37, John 3, New Birth, Philippians 4, Romans 12 , , 2 Comments

So don’t be surprised when I say, ‘You must be born again.’ John 3:7 NLT

Don’t we sometimes long for a ‘do-over’?  For years, I’ve celebrated new beginnings. But coming upon Jesus’ words this morning I spotted a new way of thinking about the new birth as he startled the learned Nicodemus.

What do people assume when they speak of a ‘do-over’?  I know my mind goes directly to inaugurating a fresh start. A chance to try again and to better THIS time.

But is that what the Bible teaches? That we all receive a clean page, unblemished by sin in order to ‘make it good this time’?

Knowing me, that’s not good news.

I don’t have confidence that I can do better.

Praise God that Jesus’ conversations point to a passive plan of action.  He does this by using the passive form of a verb, BE born again.

Okay, let’s pause for a brief grammar review.  Just what is the passive ‘voice’ in language?  Wikipedia simplifies it this way:

“…..In a clause with passive voice, the grammatical subject expresses the theme or patient of the main verb – that is, the person or thing that undergoes the action or has its state changed. This contrasts with active voice, in which the subject has the agent role….”

Jesus holds out to the current and most influential religious man in Jerusalem a different way of doing life.  It’s a receiving of an action done to him that is going to change his life forever. That is, if he submits.

Is this good news?  To me it is. For ‘try harder….do more….change your ways….start fresh’ no longer hold out hope. They simply remind me of how I CAN’T!

I remember the years that I loved January 1.  The calendar proclaimed the tempting possibility of maybe getting it RIGHT this time.  I’d pull out and unwrap a brand-new planner and write down goals and steps and the intermediate milestones, tagged to specific dates. I dared to imagine that THIS year would be better.

I don’t do that anymore.  Oh, I still have hope.  But a new kind, one that causes my entire body to relax.  I can’t change myself, but God can. Not only does he want to, it is his express plan of how we are to live.

Let’s start with what happens after what Jesus describes as the second birth. Consider this biblical fact:

Now, we are new and different living beings. And that condition is right from the start. Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come. 2 Corinthians 5:17 ESV

Okay, now what?  Is there something we are to do?  Paul tells us what to expect as new boys and girls, men and women:

Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind….Romans 12:2 ESV

If you and I were meant to do the change, the Holy Spirit would have exhorted: Don’t conform yourself to the world, but transform yourself by……

Can you SEE or maybe FEEL the difference?

Countless verses and passages in the Bible lay out for us just how much we have received (a passive action) from grace, to strength, to riches, to comfort, to guidance, even to the gift of wanting to repent.  

But here’s one of my favorite examples and this is VIVID.  Do you remember Ezekiel’s encounter with God in a vision in the Valley of Dry Bones? Read all of chapter 37 for the details, but let’s look at verses 5 and 6s showing that God is the agent.

Thus says the Lord God to these bones: Behold, I will cause breath to enter you, and you shall live. And I will lay sinews upon you, and will cause flesh to come upon you, and cover you with skin, and put breath in you, and you shall live, and you shall know that I am the Lord.

It’s ALL of the Lord’s doing.

Maybe you are you questioning:  So, we don’t do anything?  We just let ourselves be DONE to?

To the contrary! Yes, primarily we are to receive, but Paul DOES strongly exhort us to practice various ACTIVE behaviors.

For example, given ALL that God has done for us and IS doing every second, we are to:

Per Romans 12:12

  1. Thoroughly enjoy the hope, the expectation we have of permanently belonging to God as his ‘do-over’ children.
  2. Bravely and calmly bear whatever affliction or suffering he ordains.
  3. Chatter to God all the time through thanksgiving and praise and handing over all our requests.

Per Philippians 4: 8 ESV

Here is where we are to direct our thoughts:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, think about these things.

Of course, we are to read, study and meditate on God in his word daily to receive his counsel. And he DOES lay out actions we are to take like helping others and offering hospitality. 

However, I think Christians can fall into the trap of thinking it’s all about their DOING.

Let’s add thanksgiving back into our daily lives,  the ‘being done to us’ side of the Christian life.  Remember, WE don’t cause fruit to grow on our branch.  That’s the Holy Spirit’s job, too.

My words to Maria and to you are: “Relax, little branchlet, little twig, little offshoot of the trunk who is Jesus. You have a gardener who knows what he is doing.  Just be glad and receive his care and let him grow you into a strong branch.”

Are you growing more holy, more like Jesus? How can you tell?

March 13, 2023

Maria Ephesians 4, Holiness, Philippians 4, Spiritual Growth , , , , , , 1 Comment

Let your gentleness be apparent to all. The Lord is near. Philippians 4:5 BSB

A friend of mine has a daughter who drives herself. She is a very hard worker, skilled and competent. But she is too busy. Her mom can see that, as can I. Maybe that’s why an image of an earlier Maria popped into my mind this morning: ‘Grim Maria’.

This is a well-rehearsed character from maybe 15 years ago. Pretty much on a regular basis, I would set myself up with a list of ‘stuff that has to get done’.  Where did all these tasks come from?  I don’t remember. What I do recall is the belief: ‘If it’s gonna be, it’s gotta be up to me!’  My MO (modus operandi) never changed: work past fatigue and then feel resentful.  Mike called that persona, “Grim Bean” (Bean being my pet name).

How refreshing this morning to realize I haven’t seen that Maria in some years.  But thinking about my friend’s daughter, a busy mom and medical professional, I CAN recall being in her shoes. She probably truly believes she has no other choice, that there is no alternative to all she drives herself to get done.  That’s how irrational my thinking was.

Did I set out to quit playing ‘Grim Bean’?  No, that’s the marvel of it all. Since Mike and I as well as our adult sons have moved toward a more reformed theology, we’ve all come to appreciate the fact of God’s sovereignty, his total control over everything that happens in the universe.

Does that sound frightening, that an all-powerful God actually directs every molecule that exists?  Not at all.   This God is not a cold, impersonal force, directing events, nature and people, but a personal, loving and good Father who kindly offers his supernatural help to all his children who depend on him.

As this truth of who God is has sunk into my heart, I have relaxed more and off-loaded much of my life to him. For example, I don’t rush anymore, trying to cram more stuff into my day. I accept with ease what doesn’t get done.  I actually feel at peace with Jesus’ leadership and his setting of the pace of what we do together. I’m learning that none of what I do is truly ‘up to me’.

Our pastor’s sermon yesterday reenforced this posture of yielding control to God. Jim focused on the practice of forgiveness as laid out in Ephesians 4:32. He emphasized that the actions preceding Paul’s exhortation to offer forgiveness along with kindness uses the verb form of ‘Let….. (this action) take place in.’ It’s passive. It follows then that this behavioral change is something the Holy Spirit affects in us. We don’t work at it. We allow God to change us as we meditate on how gracious his initial forgiveness was and the fact that daily he welcomes us to confess and receive his cleansing. His compassions and mercies are as regular and welcome as the dawn’s early light.

I think often about the wonder and gift of having a heavenly Father and God who is in charge of both the universe and me. This is how I can relax throughout my day.  I believe that my inward state is transforming how I present to the world around me.  A gentle Maria is more the norm.

Can you see why I felt so encouraged this morning when the the Holy Spirit prompted the memory of a grim version of me? “Maria, this is evidence of spiritual growth!” 

Nevertheless, God is still about the business of growing my humility, letting me know that plenty of change is built into his holiness curriculum. One of my sins that occasionally reoccurs reminds me of the former Maria.  It’s the desire for someone to feel sorry for me and to offer me praise mixed with pity.  Namely, Mike.  Here’s how that looks. 

Yesterday after having some friends over for an early Sunday lunch, I set out to do some food prep. Two tasks morphed into several so that by the time I finished cleaning up in the kitchen it was almost 3 in the afternoon. Mike was coming down the stairs and I felt the urge to say with a staged self-deprecating sound, “I just finished doing food prep!” But by grace, the Holy Spirit poked me gently and I resisted that temptation. 

Yes, that indicates more growth. But it still shows me that I need to be mindful of how I self-assign tasks. No one is expecting me to spend that kind of time in the kitchen, not even Jesus. In fact, I didn’t even check with him first.  Now that I’m writing this, I see I should have asked, “Jesus, how do you want me to spend this Sabbath afternoon?”

Definitely God is transforming me. But with each step forward, the Holy Spirit gently shows me what the next assignment is. Glad it’s not all up to me!

Am I just burying my head in the sand?

March 3, 2023

Maria Acts 20, Fear of the Lord, Holiness, Matthew 13, Philippians 4, Trusting God, Worries , , , 1 Comment

And now I entrust you to God and to the word of His grace, Acts 20:32 NASB

I spent some time awake last night trying to come up with ways to manage the thinking and feelings of a few people I care about.  Yes, what a stupid goal THAT is and as you could easily predict, I didn’t land on any solutions.  Eventually, I fell back asleep.  But the heaviness of this self-imposed task greeted me straight away when I got up.

As seems to be the pattern, those morning-afters tend to make me very receptive to God’s suggestions. I’ve been listening to a podcast conversation between John Bevere and Christopher Cook about the holiness of God and how we are to fear letting anything come between us and Him.

Obviously, nothing material can separate me from the immaterial God, but boy oh boy can my thoughts shift my mind away from the Holy One. Thinking (or rather angsting) about the ordinary, those created and passing concerns can use up my mental and emotional energy.

Sitting down with my coffee, before I even opened my Bible, I confessed with my pen: “I’m clinging to the idol of an obligation-free, a problem-free, a dilemma-free and a thornless life here and now.  Whereas you command me to cling to you and fear MORE losing sight of you, not hearing from you and being deprived of a sense of you.”

In my heart, I know that God is holy and worthy of the majority of my thoughts.  But I had chosen to put my meditative powers to use in imagining what how others might be judging me.

After time reading some scriptures in Isaiah, I picked up a little tear off daily devotional.  God pinged me again.  The verse was:

Mathew 13:22 (NLT) The seed that fell among the thorns represents those who hear God’s word, but all too quickly the message is crowded out by the worries of this life and the lure of wealth, so no fruit is produced.

The Greek word for ‘crowded out’ is ‘suffocated’. I see that the worries of my little world and perhaps the occasional national or global issue have been absorbing my attention.  Of course, Satan is at work to cause all of them to seem ‘oh, so important’.

I then thought, “Why would I want to think about anything that weighs me down? Afterall, God offers (and commands) a different way to live. In Philippians 4, Paul exhorts me to stop and shift my gaze and thoughts upward to what and who is worthy of my attention. If I belong to Jesus, then I am connected to the supernatural power of God.  He alone can work out my fear-producing issues as well as the world’s problems.  His common grace given to all mankind together with those in his Kingdom who have access to ‘the mind of Christ’ (1 Corinthians 2:16) are one way my good Father resolves our problems.” 

So, with a glad heart that prizes God more than anything, (help me, Lord!) the Holy Spirit of God reminded me to hand over all these issues, big and small, global and personal.

Gladly, I transferred this heavy and depressing mess to him, offloading all of it at his feet (the Greek term for ‘entrust’ in the Acts 20:32 verse is ‘to lay down alongside).

Then Satan flung the thought: ‘So you’re just going to bury your head in the sand?  Is that how you plan on feeling light-hearted?’

I countered out loud: “Nope.  I’m going to copy Uncle Paul who ‘entrusted’ the Ephesian believers to God’s care, counting on the power of God’s living word of grace to be enough for them.”

I received renewed energy from all this back and forth with Jesus, but I know the battle for my mind continues. I, and you as well, have an enemy set on destroying us.

Have you ever experienced God’s supernatural peace?

December 8, 2022

Maria God's Peace, Philippians 4, Psalm 123 , , , 3 Comments

Don’t worry about anything; instead, pray about everything. Tell God what you need, and thank him for all he has done. Then you will experience God’s peace, which exceeds anything we can understand. His peace will guard your hearts and minds as you live in Christ Jesus. Philippians 4:6-7 NLT

The other night, as I settled into bed, I prayed for supernatural help NOT to think about two problems that had surfaced during the day. I didn’t want to lay awake running through what ‘I should do’ about these two situations.

One of these issues involved money, a topic which triggers me.  That is, if I have wasted money or if a bill requires dealing with a call center to resolve, I can stew and suffer unnecessary anxiety. 

As soon as I begged the Lord, “Please help me not to lie awake thinking.  I want to sleep soundly! But I know I need your supernatural help, Jesus,” a thought just ‘popped’ into my mind.

The Bible teaches that God sovereignly controls all things in the universe. Therefore, these two problems are from his hand.  He appointed them.  He sent them to me as good things, for God IS good. And if that is true, then they are his to fix, not mine.

I prayed, “Father, you appointed these, I believe you will fix them.  So, here they are. They are yours.”

And with that, I fell asleep. I awoke the next morning with a sense of peace and thanked the Father for a good night sleep.  Going about my day, a growing awe over this supernatural calmness took hold of me.

I don’t know about you, but up until now I’ve never experienced the peace that Paul promises is ours if we hand over our worries with thanksgiving to Jesus.

It’s been almost a week and I continue to trust God and not fret. Nothing is resolved, yet. But I await his timing.  Meanwhile, the Holy Spirit is working overtime to build a case for the true blessing that comes when we release something to God because we take him at his word.

I am seeing supporting scripture every day. For example, one of our readings this week was Psalm 123.  Straight out of the gate, I stopped on the first verse,

To you I lift my eyes…. Psalm 123:1

Not to these problems, do I look.  No!  I lift my eyes off Maria and look to God.

I’m growing convinced that what we look at shapes and colors our attitude, our responses to people and events as well as our feelings.

Taking time to think slowly about all verse 1 implies allowed me to remember that I’m not going to find a solution to any problem by dwelling on it.  The One who created me, the universe and all of reality, both visible and invisible, has the answers I need.  And He promises to give us this wisdom, if we ask.

How is that for a case in favor of looking away from the current trial to the One who sent it and the One who promises to handle it!

What do you hope people notice about you?

November 17, 2022

Maria Gentleness, Humility, Patience, Philippians 4, Titus , , Leave a comment

Let your ________ be evident to all. The Lord is near. Philippians 4:5 NIV

If you know your Bible well, you can easily add the missing word without checking.

Before you do pull out your phone to verify what you think Paul wrote, just play with me for a moment. What other quality might Paul have exhorted us to strive for? 

Paul COULD have said, ‘Let your…..love be evident to all’. That would make sense given that in 1 Corinthians 13 the apostle says that love is the greatest gift of the Spirit.

 Or, let your good deeds, or holiness, or Bible knowledge or wisdom. 

But no. Paul mentions ‘gentleness’. Checking synonyms, I found patience and moderation as possibilities. Paul provided more clarity in Titus 3:2, where he describes ‘gentleness’ as ‘showing humility to everyone’.

What convicted me this morning when thinking about this verse, is how I try to make some pretty shallow qualities be evident to all.  Such as my intelligence, or fitness, or even Bible knowledge.

But what I think I ACTUALLY exhibit, at times, is my selfishness.  One way this shows up is in the way I ‘naturally’ go about helping someone.  What I’m learning is that my natural response has been to provide the kind of encouragement or assistance that would help me. This means I have assumed the person is like me and shares the same needs, or receives love as I do.

Loving others takes intention and effort.  What kind of effort?  I’m realizing, again, that I have to study someone to learn what a need is and what would actually meet that need.

Just because I feel helped or loved a certain way doesn’t mean my friend processes her need the same way.

I’m a work in progress in this journey towards holiness. Progress, not perfection, is what I’m striving for.  I truly do want to be more like Jesus.

When ‘my’ plans don’t work out

March 3, 2022

Maria 1 John 5, Faith, God's Sovereignty, Philippians 4, Spiritual Warfare, Worry , , , , Leave a comment

Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7……(then) …. whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Philippians 4:8 NIV

An alert from American Airlines interrupted my lunch last week as I was checking email.  Something to the effect that bad weather might disrupt our travel plans two days later, on the Friday. The airline offered to change our plans at no cost.

The possibility of weather problems had not crossed my mind.  Immediately Satan suggested all sorts of bad scenarios meant to distract me.  We were flying to Charlottesville, Virginia to care for grandkids so their parents could visit El Paso to look at houses.  This weather event would affect their flights as well.

Recognizing that I was beginning to fear the worst, I forced myself to go on the counter-attack. I reminded myself that:

  • The Lord has these trips already planned out.
  • He has stockpiled provisions we will need.
  • His plans are always best.

Satan stepped up the momentum.  But I strengthened my resolve, asking the Lord for supernatural help to fight back.  What came to mind was the promise that if I resist the devil’s suggestions about our future, he will flee. 

I kept up my trifecta of truth.  I declared out loud:  I can’t stop these lying images from entering my imagination, but I will immediately respond with what I know to be true. 

And so, I waged war.

I had to continue resisting Satan’s lying thoughts longer than I anticipated.  When we got to the airport last Friday, weather turned out not to be the problem.  But there were others.

The flight had a mechanical issue.  We deplaned and waited in line to consult with the gate agent about connecting flights. He booked us on a flight out of Charlotte, North Carolina for an airport 75 minutes away from our destination.  Presumably, we could Uber from there to Anne and Wes’ house. But by the time we landed in Charlotte, that flight had been cancelled.

By grace, we had already thought of renting a car in Charlotte.  Sure enough, that turned out to be Plan C. But would there be any rental cars available?  We kept praying.  Sure enough, the Lord’s stockpiled grace included a rental car that we could drop off at the Charlottesville airport the next day.

Knowing our delay, our son and daughter-in-law dropped off the children with a friend and headed to Washington, DC for their flight.  We picked up the kids 6 hours later than our original itinerary. Whew! Finally, we were in the house with the kids and their dog. But God’s grace did not end there.

Wes and Anne’s flight was delayed and they had to spend the night in Houston, Texas.  God’s stockpiled grace for them included a $400 credit with the airline. And Anne, who is 31 weeks pregnant, got to bed earlier than they had planned. They arrived in El Paso the next morning in time to meet the real estate agent. And saved one day’s worth of rental car expenses.

What did I learn?  Like a 2×4 to the head was the realization ‘What a waste of emotional energy, worrying about anything. The weather event evaporated.’

This experience showed me once more that victory over sinful fear and worry comes by means of exercising our trust in our good God who does all things well, though not always the way we would like.

John, inspired by the Holy Spirit, wrote about this very scenario the four of us lived through : (and I paraphrase) ‘Our prevailing over Satan, the flesh and the world is a done deal. It is scripted that we conquer Satan and fear by means of taking God at his word and doing the next thing at hand.’

And this is the victory that has overcome the world—our faith. 1 John 5:4 ESV

It’s easy to see what I care most about

November 18, 2021

Maria Lamentations 1, Philippians 4, the Heart , , , 1 Comment

“LORD, see my anguish! My heart is broken and my soul despairs, for…..? (fill in the blank) Lamentations 1:20 NLT

I’m writing this toward the end of November 2021.  Many people all over the world feel overwhelmed and live in life circumstances fraught with turmoil.  This sentence fragment could easily introduce someone’s lament today.

What are some verse completions that would fit?

Here’s what came to mind when I made a list…..

My heart is broken and my soul despairs because….

  • Covid feels like it’ll never end
  • Rude speech seems to be the norm
  • Our country seems hopelessly divided
  • Our politicians are self-centered
  • Too few governments take global warming seriously
  • Education today is deplorable
  • Racism seems to be permanent
  • My spouse has left me
  • My children don’t want to hang out with me
  • The cancer has come back
  • This mental illness my mom suffers from seems interminable
  • My dad shows no interest in the Lord
  • I still can’t find a job
  • No one understands how I feel

I’m sure you could add to the list.

But what did the author of Lamentations write? What caused him so much pain?

Drumroll……

His own personal disobedience to the Lord!

The sentence concludes with: ….for I have rebelled against you.

It’s not how I would have finished the verse.  The contrast between this man’s heart and my heart couldn’t be greater.

I focus most of my days on me and my activities. In sum: my little world of what and whom I care about.

You’ve heard it said that a useful evaluative tool for what you find important is to examine your checkbook or credit card statement to see how you spend your money.  If that is true, then food is way up there in importance, for my monthly grocery expenditures are pretty high!

I actually think a more accurate picture of what matters most to us is what we talk about.  What are the gripping go-to issues that spill out of our mouths when we’re with others? 

I think I bring up the latest on Covid, the number of cases, views about masking and not masking, being vaccinated and not with people I encounter.  In view of what pains our rebellious ‘lamenter’ most, what tends to grab my attention is what the Bible calls ‘vanity’, those fleeting and ephemeral matters.

‘Hold on a minute!’ you might say.  ‘My mom just died from complications with Covid.  That is no small matter!’  Of course, it’s no small matter.  But Jeremiah, or whoever wrote the book of Lamentations, no doubt also lost friends and family members in that harsh siege of Jerusalem.  Yet, his heart is what bothered him most of all.

That is why this verse models a better place to invest my strongest emotions.  How much better for you might it be if ALL that I was most concerned about became the state of my heart.  As Paul reminds us in his letter to the Philippians, “Let your gentleness be known to all. The Lord is near.” Chapter 4:5

You don’t care about my opinion regarding…. politics, or Covid, or even the best way to cook.  And who wants to hear my fears about our country or the world?  Besides they just show a distrust in our sovereign and good God.

May I tend the garden of my heart first! My relationship with the One whom I call Lord has to take first place in my thoughts, my heart and my words.

Who’s carrying your burdens?

November 4, 2021

Maria 1 Corinthians 10, Holy Spirit, James 1, Philippians 4, Psalm 55, Wisdom, Worry , , , , , 1 Comment

Give your burdens to the LORD…..Psalm 55:22 NLT

I met with my counselor on Tuesday this week. We explored why I’m still struggling to decide whether I continue an endeavor or cut it off.  I’ve been ‘wishing and washing’ for more than two years, not able to make up my mind.

When I started my YouTube channel, English without Fear, in March 2018, my goal was to replace my classroom teaching salary through providing compelling, intermediate-level English stories that could benefit both English-language learners and teachers. I produced videos and materials for free to build a following, hoping eventually to convert some of them into paying clients

When the Lord suddenly moved Mike and me to Huntsville, I left my classroom job teaching French.  Due to Mike’s salary, there was no longer a need for me to work.  My purpose for having started this YouTube channel and website evaporated. I kept it up, however, out of a sense of pride for having begun it and for the identity it gave me. I also viewed it as a type of voluntary contribution to the language acquisition community. But my feelings toward it vacillated.

At the end of my counseling session, Teresa challenged me to pray in a way that had never crossed my mind.  She suggested I ask the Lord, ‘What would YOU have me do with my life, since you have planted me here in Huntsville?’ That’s a much broader, open question. It actually excited me.  Maybe there’s a new adventure God would have me take up, something I’ve never imagined, but one that he has been preparing me for all along. Up until now, I’ve only prayed for wisdom about continuing to invest time and energy in this ESL tool I started back in North Carolina.

Recently, God reminded me of the verse at the beginning of this post.  Hence, I’ve been thinking of Sherpa guides. I can imagine climbing a perilous Himalayan peak, tightly tied to my guide.  Using only climbing poles, my back is weight free. If the ascent challenges me, my guide takes the lead. Other times, I walk beside him, securely attached to my moving stronghold.

Isn’t that a picture of how our Christian life is to be? No anxiety should burden us if we keep casting each one on our guide, the Holy Spirit. Paul picks up this reality in his letter to the Philippians. Because the Lord is near, we are privileged to keep handing over all worries.

Wouldn’t it be a stupid sight to behold, a mountain climber loaded down with all his heavy baggage and struggling to keep up with the Sherpa guide who burden free hiked along?

Yesterday morning when I journaled, I wrote to Jesus, asking him to show me what he wants me to do here in Huntsville. I asked him specifically, ‘What do YOU say about…?’ and I listed all the ‘chosen’ activities I do during the week.  Then at the gym, the Holy Spirit brought to mind James’ advice:

If you need wisdom, ask our generous God, and he will give it to you. He will not rebuke you for asking. But when you ask him, be sure that your faith is in God alone. James 1:5-6 NLT

I thanked the Lord for this promise and reminded myself that if I trust him to provide wisdom, to respond to my prayer, then I don’t need to keep thinking and deliberating.  Especially if he truly is my divine Sherpa guide on whom I have off-loaded this issue that has perturbed me on and off for 2 years!

I’m excited to see where he is leading me, what he is going to open up for me. If I count on him to keep being God and to continue his faithful pattern of how he cares for his chosen sheep, then I can rest in his promised provision of wisdom and insight.

Older Entries