Fighting back against harmful thoughts

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For as he thinks within himself, so he is. Proverbs 23:7 NASB
Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life. Proverbs 4:23. And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true… Philippians 4:8 NLT

As I reflect back over the year 2025, I give thanks for the defensive spiritual weapons the Lord has given me to fight back against the foul spirits directed by Satan. The essence of these biblical truths and commands above, together with some cultural adages, have served me well.

You do know we are engaged in a cosmic war, right? As those who have been transferred out of Satan’s kingdom of darkness and into God’s bright kingdom of light and righteousness, we are constantly under attack.

Last week, on Christmas Eve day, I battled jealousy on and off until mid-afternoon. Current photos our daughter-in-law posted of her four children delighting in some curated fun with “the other grandparents” triggered me to conclude that they are “the better grandparents.” It also didn’t help that we were not around family, although we had recently spent most of Thanksgiving week with all six of our grandkids.

So, how did I fight back?

All I can say is that I kept at it. I didn’t stop battling. I alternated between confessing my sinful thoughts and thanking God for these other loving grandparents who live closer and can lavish attention and gifts on them more frequently than we can.

What helped most was uttering out loud to Maria, “The story I’m telling myself is…,” as well as reminding myself of the many times we, too, have planned fun experiences, building strong bonds and creating. Finally, Satan let up, and my heart (thoughts) returned to a state of peace.

In 2025, “the story I’m telling myself” has served as my go-to shield. I wield this defensive weapon whenever I find myself succumbing to harmful thinking. At times when Mike articulates a negative script about his circumstances, I will remind him to choose a different possible story. Yes, we are able, through God’s Spirit, to select what we know to be true and not draw damaging conclusions from our imaginations.

On Thursday, I was just feeling sorry for myself, and Satan toyed with me.

Scripture teaches us that God has endowed ALL believers with the gift of sound, or logical, thinking (2 Timothy 1:7), and He expects us to use this gift—to practice it.

As the verses above show, we are commanded to keep guard over our thought lives (our hearts). I’m sure you’ve heard Proverbs 18:21 multiple times, reminding us that life and death are in the power of tongue. What we think and say to ourselves DOES matter.

My only goal for 2026 is to work on my heart. I am praying that daily, with intentionality, I will weed the garden of my heart. I’m counting on God’s Word and some curated self-talk to keep my armor in shape.

By the way, I haven’t forgotten one other self-talk help in my arsenal—the title of the book What If It’s Wonderful? by Nicole Zasowski. I use these four words whenever I catch myself, out of fear, futurizing “the worst possible scenario.”

How do you fight back with God’s help?

Has how you pray changed over the years?

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“Lord, teach us to pray….” Luke 11:1 ESV

Today, 4 May 2023, is our country’s National Day of Prayer, a time to renew our practice of prayer and perhaps adjust it.

I can sense changes in how I now talk to God, especially in how I intercede for others.

Have you ever noticed how children pray?  They blurt out exactly what they want. “Jesus, give us a good day.” And rightly so. We must enter the kingdom with that same simple but cheery, trusting and care-free approach. Our Lord wants us to hand over every material and immaterial situation to him. But our Father also expects us to grow in our understanding and practice of praying.

For a while my care for God’s honor, for his name has increased. His expansive goals and perspective are slowly replacing my limited ones, or maybe amplifying them.

Remember how God planned to liberate Israel from Pharaoh as well as cause Egypt to know experientially that HE is Yahweh, the LORD? He had dual purposes.  And so can we.

This morning, I asked Jesus that the four men in my immediate family would honor God in how they pray for their wives. That he would give them the spirit of wisdom and revelation in their work. As well as draw them deeper into intimacy with our Father. Then reading Oswald Chamber’s meditation for today, I felt resolve to pray more like this expand.

With razor-sharpness, Chambers diagnoses the limited ways we intercede for others. (May 4 meditation from My Utmost for His Highest)  “We do not identify ourselves with God’s interests and concerns for others…..we are always ready with our own ideas, and our intercession becomes only the glorification of our own natural sympathies…..Vicarious intercession means that we deliberately substitute God’s interests in others for our natural sympathy with them.”

So, where do you start if you want to mature in how you pray for others? You can’t go wrong by allowing ‘the Lord’s Prayer’ to shape and change your approach.  Think of it as a framework, a springboard for a personal and God-honoring way to intercede.

Focus first on God’s goals and purposes. If we are believers, then our primary goals, our ‘first concerns’ should be the Lord’s, such as the honoring of his name, kingdom expansion, and all his purposes to become reality.  Then we are invited to hand over what we need this day, personally as well as for others.  This is where we can mention the immediate situations and needs, such as Jim’s surgery or travel safety for Sally, or a peace-filled resolution to the war in Ukraine.

But, don’t you want to talk to practice talking with the Father like Jesus?  For inspiration and guidance, we can sink our teeth deep into John 17 and study how Jesus prayed and for what.  We can select one of his petitions for the day and model our prayers for others on that.

For sure all and any sincere conversation with the Lord is a GOOD and RIGHT thing. This is not a suggestion to leave one way behind and replace it with something new. It’s a both/and.

Who knows, maybe Jesus is calling you into a grand adventure.  Maybe this shift will cause you to look forward to praying for others with a greater sense of expectancy.

Beware, though, Satan will not be pleased. So, armor up each morning with all the spiritual defenses and the one offensive arm we are to use, God’s Word.  

The pattern of spiritual attacks

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As the Scriptures say, “God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.” So, humble yourselves before God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you. James 4:6-7 NLT

Almost 20 years passed before I recognized Satan’s spiritual attacks. Of course, I had heard of spiritual warfare and read Ephesians 6 multiple times, and I could see Satan’s hand in life’s suffering.  But a new awakening to spiritual reality took place half way through the most severe religious persecution I had ever experienced.

As soon as I arrived at Carolina Day School in Asheville, North Carolina, the harassment started.  Middle school parents believed stories their children, my French students, passed on, about how I was ‘proselytizing’, how I (an evangelical) crossed myself during class, as do Catholics.  I fervently sought other jobs, clamoring to get out of there, but God kept me at this school.  It was awful.

Cousin Terry gave me a promise to cling to:

No weapon formed against you shall prosper. Isaiah 54:17 NKJV

I asserted that fact over and over, many times in a day as I walked to the copy room or bathroom.

I understood external suffering from outside, but I had never been conscious of the dark world’s incursions into my thought life.  I had always assumed that I was she who gave birth to discouraging notions and feelings. They were products of my mind, or so I had always reasoned.

But half way through my tenure at this school, about six years ago, the Lord opened my eyes to a new facet of spiritual reality.  I was about to travel with other teachers to a conference.  Very demoralized about my French teaching and how students and parents reacted, I didn’t want to go.  Two nights before our departure, I experienced what I’ve heard termed, ‘the dark night of the soul’.

My despair over teaching spread to every part of my life.  Not only did I not think I could or should continue teaching, I saw myself as incapable of being Mike’s wife, of being a grandmother, of continuing to manage our week-to-week finances, even of preparing meals.  So convinced that these changes were true, I awoke feeling unable to carry on with my life. Not suicidal, but in total despair and without hope. Someone or something had flushed my normal enthusiasm down the drain

I don’t know the exact moment God draw back the curtain, but it was later that same day. Suddenly, I knew!  These weren’t my thoughts; they belonged to the devil!!!  Relief flooded my mind and heart.  As fresh energy for life flowed back in, I felt strengthened and enthusiastic once more.

I partook of the conference and even acquired some new ways of engaging students.  I returned to my classroom, feeling ready to carry on.  Praise be to God.

That event and what God taught me propelled me on to enjoying the best three (and final) years of my French classroom career.

Five and half years later, I still experience AND recognize occasional attacks.  But not always do I identify their source.  I still have fallen for the lie that they are MY thoughts and feelings.

The other night turned out differently.  After at least two hours of sleeplessness around what I affectionately call “pee o’clock”, I fell into a nightmare.  Just before the alarm sounded, I was praying in my dream, “Help me! I am under spiritual attack!”

Fifteen minutes later, although tired, I eagerly sat down with coffee, Bible and my journal at hand. As I had been feeding the cats and making the coffee, I quickly recognized what had occurred. With the dream still fresh, I replayed my fearful, desperate cry for rescue against this enemy.

As I started to write about this, God took me in a different direction, his application surprising me. I had spent part of my awake time, worrying about all the self-assigned tasks for the coming week and my desire to have more ‘Maria time’. What God brought to mind turned out to be a picture of my prevailing sin as a bed of smoldering coals.

I hoard time for Maria, and am aware of this top manifestation of my sinful selfishness. Suddenly, I pictured Satan blowing on these coals of ‘Not enough time for Maria’.  Small flames of discouragement had flamed into strong fire during my awake worry time.

What is interesting is that over the past couple of months, I have actually relaxed more about ‘time’, trusting God’s grace to be sufficient. More and more, I have let go of the need to get stuff done.

Thanks be to God, I saw my nightmare for what is is, a desperate dark ploy to keep me tied to Satan’s lie.

I immediately dumped cold water, dousing those roused embers. And Satan fled.

Then I wrote in my journal a version of Paul’s account of his take-away in God’s Holiness School.

Paul wrote:

I have learned to be content whatever the circumstances. I know what it is to be in need, and I know what it is to have plenty. I have learned the secret of being content in any and every situation, whether well fed or hungry, whether living in plenty or in want. I can do all this through him who gives me strength. Philippians 4:11-13 NIV

I composed this:

I have learned to be more content each day.  I know what it is to have little time and what it is to have plenty.  I am practicing the secret of being content in either case, whether I have ‘too much’ to do or the day looks wide open.  I can trust Jesus to provide just what I need for what he has pre-planned for me to do.

In other words, it’s okay to be weak, to be needy, to not have enough time.  As a needy little child, I can safely trust my Father to give me what I need. I’m not wise enough to know about the day ahead.  But he is!