Pressure guaranteed, Peace optional

March 13, 2013

Maria Job, John, Matthew, Peace, Psalm 84, Uncategorized , , , 2 Comments

“In this life you WILL have trouble,” Jesus proclaimed (Matt 16:33b)

I didn’t grow up in a biblical home.  Sure I knew that people had problems.  The quiet neighbor across the street murdered his wife.  My parents were divorced for ten years of my life. My mom had suffered a mental breakdown when she was in her 20s.  But none of that really touched me.  So when I started encountering my own personal setbacks, I reacted with genuine but predictable “That’s not fair!”

What I’ve learned since is

  • we all have problems
  • some people have it worse
  • once you get through one problem, there is always another

Anne, my daughter-in-law puts it this way when describing their current suffering:  “That’s just OUR HARD!”

This remark popped up during a discussion about another family she and toddler Noah had recently visited.  Anne and her husband Wes’ our hard is the deployment with its separation and intermittent anxiety.

Anne and I were savoring God’s promise in Psalm 84:11 to withhold NO GOOD thing from those of us who trust in Jesus’ righteousness.   Although Anne quickly asserted that she very much wants to see Wes sooner than the scheduled August return, she also doesn’t want to miss out on any of the ‘good things’ that God has planned.

What an attitude!  I love how she has captured human problems as a series of ‘our hards’.   (I have her permission to quote her!)

Not only knowing that God has good gifts stockpiled among life’s pressures, problems and pains, but the fact that our ‘lot’ is actually appointed for us is a comfort:   Look at how Job describes God’s plans in chapter 23: 10-14

But he knows the way that I take;
when he has tried me, I shall come out as gold.
11 My foot has held fast to his steps;
I have kept his way and have not turned aside.
12 I have not departed from the commandment of his lips;
I have treasured the words of his mouth more than my portion of food.
13 But he is unchangeable, and who can turn him back?
What he desires, that he does.
14 For he will complete what he appoints for me,
and many such things are in his mind.

Don’t think that this is just primitive man’s understanding of God.  In the New Testament, Paul affirms this very same truth – that God PLANS/PREMEDITATES/PURPOSES each individual life, packed with intentional circumstances and experiences.  We don’t and WON’T KNOW all the whys and wherefores, but we can trust Him.  Over and over in Scripture, we read of God’s mercy, loving kindness and compassion that go together with His sovereign control and sustaining of all.

Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.  (1 Cor 7:17)

**

You say, : “Okay, so it’s a fact that life is hard and that these situations are planned for us by God.   Du-uh!  All one has to do is open his eyes and see the suffering. Where’s the good news in that?”

It’s coming!  Bear with me a moment……

God HAS promised to give us peace, but it is conditional.  We’ve got to do something.  Let’s look at another gospel where Jesus talks about trials.  In John 16:33 He says:

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.

What do we have to do to get that peace?   One action, based on knowledge:

We are called to take heart, to encourage ourselves. How?  By knowing who Jesus is and who we are if we are united to Him.   Jesus tells us that if HE has rescued, redeemed and brought us into His Kingdom as His subject/family member/ steward/ ambassador/ soldier, then we have EVERYTHING we need to live on Earth and grow more holy.

(2 Peter 1:2-3) Grace and peace be yours in abundance through the knowledge of God and of Jesus our Lord. His divine power has given us everything we need for a godly life through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.

Here’s another promise that can give us peace IF we soak it into our pores:

All things, all the our hards work TOGETHER (that’s divine coordination) for our GOOD, for us who belong to His forever family who are purposed by Him to love Him.

(my paraphrase of Romans 8:28)

So God equips His people and promises that the fact that Jesus has overcome the world makes the difference in our suffering.  The resurrection is how Jesus has overcome the world.  And if we are unified with Jesus, then we ultimate overcome our suffering instead of being overcome.  Being in Christ means we have access to supernatural power and wisdom.

Now all this valley-slogging, these our hards are definitely painful.  No denying that. But somehow knowing that……..

-they are planned

-for my good

-and are meant for me to face and walk through equipped with Jesus’ presence and tools

….makes the difference.  As John Piper says, “Let’s not waste our suffering!”

So what is your OUR HARD and how are you blessed?

 

I’m adopted!

January 16, 2013

Maria Uncategorized , , , Leave a comment

I’m adopted!

….which means that I have been chosen, wanted and planned for.  It is this idea that needs to dominate and be my source of comfort every idle moment.

The ‘New City’ iPad app has a shortened, edited version of the Westminster Catechism (52 Qs & As – one for each week).  Question 1 gets right to the point:  “What is our only hope in life and death?”  Answer:  “That we are not our own, but belong, body and soul, both in life and death to God and our Savior Jesus Christ”

In my last post I talked about spiritual warfare.  The enemy prowls around, intent on sabotaging and weakening our faith.  Natural physical rhythms like sleep also attenuate our faith. So when we awaken in the morning, we must draw new strength for the day by preaching the good news, the TRUTH, to ourselves.

Part of my routine on my morning walk is to remind myself out loud of what I am glad.  And you know, these benefits that accompany my adoption actually are written down in the official adoption papers called the Bible.

  • My life is hidden safe in Christ.
  • Christ is in me.  How so? –the Holy Spirit God moved in as a down-payment/deposit/ engagement ring or promise. Therefore, I have the assurance of future glory and an inheritance.
  • I have everything I need (all grace) to do what God wants me to do as His ambassador, His steward, His soldier.  I am not dependent on my ideas or my strength. I am not limited by the lack of resources.
  • His purpose for my life is the development of His likeness in me – i.e. growing in holiness….becoming suitable for His Son as a member of the Heavenly Bride
  • I’m carrying in my spiritual pocket an invitation to the Wedding Feast of the Lamb.  When I RSVPd, the Angels rejoiced in heaven
  • That RSVP (my name engraved on His hands) I can never lose.  And it entitles me to untold spiritual riches
  • I can trust God and what He promises by looking at two things:

-His compassion shown on the Cross

-His power shown by the resurrection

I don’t feel like thinking of these FACTS all the time, so the times when I DO feel less resistant to spiritual matters (1st thing in the morning), I need to eat, take in spiritual nourishment.  And you might have heard what the French say, “L’appétit vient en mangeant”   One becomes hungry by eating.   Bon appétit!

I want more than a blessing

January 21, 2012

Maria 2 Corinthians, Anxiety, Genesis, James, Joy , , , Leave a comment

Genesis 24:1   Now Abraham was old, advanced in age; and God had blessed Abraham in every way.

So….what more could he want? Abraham had wealth, status, power and obviously favor with God.

If I were Abraham I would want a lot more:  CONTROL and ABSENCE OF PROBLEMS!

You see, Abraham, though amazingly blessed, still had a major challenge.  His son Isaac needed a wife, the right kind of woman who would be appropriate to play a major role in God’s promised plan.  So Abraham sent his oldest and most trusted servant (we never learn his name) on a long-shot mission, to persuade a suitable woman to come out in the middle of ‘nowhere’ to marry into a very strange family.

Here’s the point.  Even when we have ALL of God’s blessings, we still have to deal with problems.  Challenges/burdens are opportunities to trust God and wait with patience while praying steadfastly.  These unlikely ‘friends’ are also reminders to hold our desired ends lightly.  When faced with a problem, I usually know how I want it to work out.  My vision causes me to be anxious, because I realize that I lack the ability (control) to bring about what I want.  I chafe at this lack of assurance that my outcome will be realized.  So I regard problems as anathema and think sometimes that they should not even be, since I’m now a Child of God, a believer.

But God’s ways are not Maria’s. I think I’m getting a glimpse of how God has set up life for His children.

The only way we will continue to trust our Father is for us to be needy.  Problems are both God’s chosen means to insure on-going reliance on Him and a daily wake-up call that we are not in control.  He obviously thinks we are at risk of forgetting this fact.

Here’s what I’ve been pondering.  If God means problems to be woven into the fabric of human life, both for believers and pagans alike, then I should change how I look at them.  Yes, I know about Brother James’ ‘Pure Joy Club’ (….count it pure joy, my brothers when you meet trials of all kinds…James 1:2 ) but despite that verse and others from Paul, I still regard problems as ‘the enemy’!

Recently, however, I encountered a different way of looking at life.  And it’s tempting.  CS Lewis apparently divided the world into happy people and people who don’t LIKE to be happy.  Before reading this, I naively assumed that happy people were those with no more problems.  But maybe that species does not even exist.  If that is so, then maybe Paul was onto something when he affirmed (first paraphrasing 2 Cor 5:5 –since we have this down payment -i.e. Holy Spirit  of what is to come, ”Therefore,) we always feel cheerful, confident and courageous..…” 2 Cor 5:6a

So here’s my new prayer:  Father, enable me to remember hourly what You have done for me through my adoption and assigned inheritance and equipping me with the permanent Holy Spirit as a guarantee of what is mine.  Furthermore, so change my mind through your Holy Spirit Renovation project that just thinking of my adoption and inheritance cheers me to no end so that I take the daily problems in stride.  After all, stupid is the child of God who keeps problems to herself instead of casting them on her Father to handle.

Information Overload v. Applied Knowledge

January 12, 2012

Maria 2 Corinthians , , , Leave a comment

But we have this treasure, in jars of clay, to show that this all-surpassing power is from God and not ourselves. (2 Cor 4:7)

I am overwhelmed by information.  Because of the űber-abundance of blog-posts… you-tube videos…. search engines…. people’s opinions ad infinitum (et ad nauseum) I find myself unable to keep up.  Of course I am the one who has defined what comes into my backyard.  I am the gatekeeper.  Yet even knowing that I myself have chosen certain podcasts, blogs, correspondances, magazines, and papers, their presence in my world have become a burden.  Who or what will rescue me from this increasing feeling of lack of time?

Merci au Seigneur – thank the Lord.  His word has clarified the distinction between information and knowledge.  And THAT has helped me re-think the situation.  There will always be more information than I can take in.  But information is of no use until it becomes meaningful to me in the form of knowledge.  I see knowledge as information that I have chewed and processed and lodged on my treed, my framework of thinking.   When that ‘knowledge-byte’ is accessible and useful, and grounded in Biblical truth, it can serve to guide me in life choices.

I am struck by how often the word knows/knowledge is used in Scripture.  Consider how it is used in the 2 Corinthians passage in Chapter 4 –

6 For God, who said, ‘Let light shine out of darkness’, has shone in our hearts so as to givethe light of the knowledge of the glory of God in the face of Jesus Christ.  7 But we have this treasure injars of clay,to show that the surpassing power belongs to God and not to us.

I think that ‘treasure ‘is this knowledge of the ‘god-ness’ or glory of Jesus and the fact that we KNOW that He is in us via the Holy Spirit.

Yesterday I was reading a devotion written by J.I. Packer and found myself SO relieved by how he interpreted verse 5 in the Romans 5 passage where Paul assures us that “… hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.”

This verse has always felt like an indictment of my lack of Christian love because I don’t FEEL that love in my heart.  But Packer described it as the KNOWLEDGE of God’s love.  Now THAT I can relate to, for I’m reminded that,

“God demonstrates and clearly proves his love toward us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us”?  (Rom 5:8)

I see that knowing, i.e. remembering truths about God is what I called wisdom when applied to one’s life.

We come full circle.  Part of that wisdom is the ability to set limits.  And God actually helps.  Part of my frustration with the abundance of information out there originates in the 24 hour day.  God has set up boundaries.  I bump up or crash into them, but they are there for my own good.  They force me to assess, to make choices.  I want to be able to say with the Psalmist, ‘the boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places.  I have a good & beautiful heritage.’ (Ps 16)

Underneath support – a thought for the New Year

December 30, 2011

Maria Colossians, Hebrews, Hope, Peace , , Leave a comment

I’m 54 and have been alive since I was 24.  It was in February of 1982 when God ‘rescued me from the dominion of darkness and transferred me into the kingdom of the Son He loves’. (Col 1:13) When you hear ‘rescue’, think plucked out. When you hear ‘transferred’, think of change in location.

I began to sprout & grow in direct proportion to the food I took in (Bible reading and study), but then the Enemy launched a full-scale frontal attack.  The first wave was the very big distraction of a multi-level marketing business that my husband’s boss offered us.  We were flattered that an older adult would ‘think so highly of us’.  Our goals changed and we followed the lure of easy money for about 7 years.  Our spiritual life went dormant. Further attacks followed with job struggles and marriage problems.

Then the aroma of life beckoned and little by little we awoke to the fact, THE FACT, that we were still alive.  But it wasn’t until we started to eat again (take in God’s word through Bible study, books on doctrine, podcast sermons and eventually meals from a Biblical church) that we really grew and started to heal. Looking back over the past 30 years, here is what I see as a bottom-line lesson.

Just like physical nourishment, aka Food is typically spaced out in 3 meals and a snack or 2 per day, so daily Biblical nourishment is a no-brainer.

But what I am finding is that a habitual quiet time (whether mid-morning, after supper, or either one of the dark book ends of the day) requires supplementation. Useful to me has been either meditation via scripture memory and/or a summary thought as in: ‘Well, this day might stink, but at least I know …….”

Here is my tri-pod assurance/ ‘insurance’ that I keep running back to throughout the day. Recalling these assurances provide me with on-going sustenance until the next ‘rendezvous’ with God’s Word:

  • My biggest problem in life has been solved: the wrath of God is no longer ON ME.  I have ‘eirene’ or peace with God because of the substitution and swapping of my actual guilt for Jesus’ righteousness.
  • My future is assured: ‘Christ in me, the expectation of Glory’ – I have a place in Heaven being saved and securely kept for me by Jesus – an unlimited life of excitement and adventure and face-to-face intimacy with the amazing Triune God.
  • The God of Jacob is my current, present help: Jacob was not a very nice character:  he was a swindler and a passive husband.  Yet because of God’s covenant with him, God helped, empowered and led him in incredible ways.  He didn’t deserve anything good, yet experienced a ‘more than one can ask or imagine life’.

As a believer, an heir along with my brother Jesus, these 3 facts are true and real.  They are my ballast. They are always there with me.  But the hard part is the decision to shift my thoughts to these truths.  They might be invisible, but they are more real than the transitory circumstances that get one down.

So, my prayer for you is that you find your bottom line, your ‘well, at least…’

Then hold on tight. As the writer to the Hebrews counsels (2:1), “We must pay the most careful attention, therefore, to what we have heard, so that we do not drift away.”

Here’s to NOT drifting.  Keep connected to your anchor.  May you grow more in awe and love with Christ in 2012

The futility of self-imposed goals

November 21, 2011

Maria 2 Corinthians, Thinking , , , Leave a comment

“For freedom Christ has set us free: stand firm therefore, and do not submit again to the yoke of slavery.”  Gal 5:1

On the surface, this verse argues for a religion that orients on what God has done a priori and not what we have to do a posteriori to earn His favor. (If you’ve been around a Gospel-preaching church, you will have heard at least once that the Father punished the Son for our rebellion & evil deeds and then credited us with the Son’s perfect record of righteous living.)  The Christian religion or practices AFTER this event in history include taking this message to the world and teaching ourselves to walk in light of this ‘fait accompli’.

But as I struggle daily with understanding the Gospel message & power, I realize that I still live in the self-created religion of “Good Day/ Bad Day”.

Have you heard about this religion?  I don’t think I’m the only practitioner.  But I have my version and I would wager that you, fellow believer, have your personalized script.  You and I, we do pretty well at spouting ‘Done, not Do’.  Like you, I am SO BEYOND working my way toward earning God’s approval.  I’ve absorbed Tim Keller, Mike Horton and Tullian Tchividjian’s messages.  It’s not: what would Jesus do, but what has Jesus done.

My version of religion is far more insidious.  Here’s how it works:  I have appointed myself God and have created one religious rule for obtaining salvation/approval/heaven on earth.  This is how it goes:

I am worthy if I meet standard X,Y or Z

How I measure my day, is based on how well I succeed in meeting my standard.

My husband will ask me, “Did you have a good day?” It’s an innocent and loving question, even innocuous on the surface.  But how does one answer it?  It depends on how one defines GOOD!

Here are some possibilities from my life and others. See if you identify.

  • I was able to get the house clean – so it was a good day
  • Not one of the kids threw up, got into an argument, or broke anything – so it was a good day
  • I saw some progress in my projects at work – so it was a good day
  • I knocked off many items from my list – so it was a good day
  • My students were eating out of my hand – so it was a good day
  • I was pain-free – so it was a good day
  • I was complimented by my boss – so it was a good day
  • I stayed on my diet – so it was a good day
  • My kids didn’t annoy me – so it was a good day
  • I had a good night sleep – so it was a good day
  • I felt like I made a difference at work – so it was a good day
  • I got an A on the test – so it was a good day
  • I now have a date for Prom – so it was a good day
  • I paid the bills and there was enough money in the account – so it was a good day
  • I got accepted by a college/ I got offered a job – so it was a good day
  • I didn’t have to wait long to see the doctor – so it was a good day
  • It’s Friday and I made it through the week – so it was a good day
  • I had some time to myself – so it was a good day
  • It rained on the crops – so it was a good day
  • She called/ she didn’t call – so it was a good day
  • He listened to me – so it was a good day
  • I felt worthwhile…loved…. respected by him/ her/ them – so it was a good day

 

What’s wrong with this list, you might be saying?  They are perfectly normal things.  It’s not like we’ve set the standard unrealistically high: winning the lottery or being elected President.

The perversity of it is that we even have a list by which we measure ourselves.  Yes, we have tasks and work to do.  But we are not to evaluate ourselves by how or if we do them.  They should be emotion-free.  And scratch off any evaluative item that has to do with getting people to do something or think something.  That’s MORE than futile – that’s stupid!!! (I’m talking to myself.J)

So what are we to do?  Wrong question!  It’s rather, “how are we to order our thinking?”  By remembering, repenting and asking for Holy Spirit help to SUPER-GLUE our minds on the Truth.  Here are the 3 biggies that make up the basic Truth

  • God & Jesus & the HS planned and carried out a rescue mission, saving us from the futile way we were living.  You & I have immeasurable worth in view of the trouble the Trinity went to save us.
  • We have enough supernatural power in us as new creations (courtesy of our permanent resident, the Holy Spirit) to accomplish what God wants us to do.
  • We have a certain and eternal future which far outweighs the suffering and disappointment we all face every day, every week and every year of our lives.

So what should be our goal? What benchmark do we set for ourselves so we know how to measure whether it’s been a good day, a good year, and a good life?  If money, achievement, personal or relational goals are taken away, what is left?

“Therefore, (in view of all that awaits us and all that God has done) we have as our ambition….to be pleasing to Him” 2 Cor 5: 9

That’s it!  And if we fail today, we repent and start over tomorrow, confident that our falling short doesn’t affect our true security. When we succeed, we thank Him for his grace that enabled us to please Him this day.  This Christ-purchased freedom leaves no room for shame, pride, frustration or anger.

There is one other benefit to this re-ordered way of thinking and self-evaluation.  Since we’re no longer our own god with our own self-imposed standard of righteousness, we are not even tempted to impose on others OUR rules for correct behavior.  Think of the angst we endure when we add ‘judge of those around me’ to our job description.  These co-workers, fellow drivers, family members and friends might not even aware of the game we are playing.   Yet we judge them and feel superior.

The prison door is not locked. Come on out and breathe the fresh air of freedom. “For you know that God paid a ransom to save you from the empty life you inherited from your ancestors. And the ransom he paid was not mere gold or silver.” 1 Pet 1:18

 

PS:  If you’re wondering how we are to please the Lord, ask the Lord to show you in your reading of His word.  I’m starting with just taking Him at His Word, believing what He says and resting in that.

 

 

 

One Word

November 10, 2011

Maria John , , , 2 Comments

I heard a woman assert that Christianity was not just about what the Bible says but living your life ‘christianly’.  I’m not sure what she means, but one thing I can conclude is that most people don’t know what Christianity is all about.

A recurring theme in our discussions and study at home is the idea of Done v. Do.  My husband and I are grateful and energized by this distinction.

The Gospel is good news about what God did to rescue condemned sinners. Therefore, if I had to boil down all the teachings of the Bible to just one word, it would be Substitution.

Jesus resolutely swapped places with condemned, rebellious men, women and children and was executed for our cosmic crimes against the Holy Creator and God.   He lovingly drank every drop of God’s justifiable wrath stored up for us and endured total (albeit temporary) separation from the God-head.  In turn, we received credit for His 100 % righteous behavior and fulfillment of God’s law so we can have peace with God.

Two –way substitution qualified us to be adopted and included in an eternal inheritance.  Nothing remains to be done!

Yet this seems too good to be true.  Therefore, churches continue to preach Do…Do…Do!

Well, aren’t we SUPPOSED to do something?  The question evidences our natural default.  Just like when we were teens and wondering about sexual limits, we long to know what we have to do.

Even Jesus’ followers pinned Him down by asking, “Then they said to him, “What must we do, to be doing the works of God” Jesus answered, “The work of God is this: to believe in the one he has sent.”  (John 6:28-29)

Correct knowledge is what counts.  We need to hear the Good News every day.  Only when we do, will we find ourselves being energized and swept up in the amazing joy of our rescue.  Out of that will flow worship/service.  When Jesus brought Lazarus back to life and Mary KNEW the power and truth of God, she joyfully worshipped and served the Savior by lavishing her 401k plan on Jesus’ feet (aka – the jar of perfume – thank you John Piper for your exposition in your 11/6/2011 sermon).

A young friend of ours was lamenting the lack of passion and fervor in his Sunday School class (young parents in their 20s).  Maybe it’s not their fault! I think they are just exhausted from growing up as 2nd and perhaps 3rd generational Christians, raised in an evangelical Christian community that batters them week after week with guilt-laden exhortations to do more.   No wonder they seem apathetic.  Only the Gospel will energize them.

And to assume that they know the Gospel and don’t need to hear it repeatedly in different ways is just as wicked as that husband.  You know the one I mean, the one who can’t be bothered to tell his wife daily in new & creative ways how much he loves her.  Instead he sputters defensively, “My wife already KNOWS I love her. I told her when we were dating.  After all, I wouldn’t have married her if I didn’t love her.”

My two pillars

October 30, 2011

Maria 1 John, 2 Corinthians, Colossians , , , Leave a comment

See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God! 1 John 3:1

Our principal’s husband spoke at chapel on Friday.  He engaged the students (12-18 year olds) by first painting a picture of his uncomfortable high-school years.  I’m sure some of them can identify with feeling shy and wanting to belong to some group, any group!  John, today a high-energy extraverted salesman, found a home in high school among the drama kids.

Toward the end of his talk, which dealt with the life-long struggle with sin, he mentioned that taking the Gospel into painful situations is the key to the temptations of sin.  He offered a scenario sure to resonate with teens: enduring conflict and difficult conversation with one’s parents.  As I sat in the audience, I waited for him to explain exactly how one ‘takes’ the Gospel into problems.

All of a sudden I got it!  Being a child of God MEANS we have a lot to look forward to that is 100 % certain. Our status and our inheritance are guaranteed by Jesus’ covenantal shed blood.  Knowing that our future is going to be full of pleasure & joy, we can endure more easily life’s frequent bouts of ‘affliction, disappointment, hardship, inconvenience and pressure’ (Romans 5: 3).

This faith in future grace reminds me of a Tim Keller story (Pastor, Redeemer Church in NYC). Two men were hired to muck out a stable for a time-certain period.  The contract with one was for a paltry sum of money.  The contract with the other was for a million dollars.  Same dirty, smelly work but different future rewards.  The one griped, the other whistled.  What made the difference?  The knowledge of what was waiting for each.

That thought prompted my mind to slip over to 2 verses that I’ve memorized, my new twin pillars to keep me steady in the midst of ever-changing circumstances:

–Christ in you, the hope of glory, Col 1:27…..(Christ in ME, the assurance of future joy, pleasure, satisfaction, love, celebration, peace….)

–But our light and momentary afflictions are achieving an eternal weight, an abundance of glory that far outweighs them all,  2 Cor 4:17…..(Yes, each day brings pain and uncertainty.  That’s the nature of living in a fallen world.  But God’s word assures me that there is a purpose and a payoff for the trials…).

These verses are just 2 of many promises meant to sustain us, to support us, to keep us from falling down under tribulation.

I think that is what John Lane meant by ‘taking the Gospel’ with you when you face trials.

Again, it’s what you know that makes all the difference.

Our Father, remind us what it means to love you with all our mind and give us the will and strength to do so.  Amen

Overwhelmed…again!

August 27, 2011

Maria 1 Samuel , , , 2 Comments

Anxiety, my old friend!

No….I want new companions. I’m sick and tired of flirting with dysfunctional thinking.  Isn’t that what ‘renewing our minds’ is all about?  Aren’t we new creations?  Where’s that daily bread of “I can do all things through Him who strengthens me!”?

Welcome back to the first week of school. I was excited all summer, riding the crest of free time and still basking in the completion of a surprising good year.

Yet here I am again, at the start of my 20th year of teaching French, fighting feelings of inadequacy.  I don’t understand.  I can only chalk it up to God’s decision that for this stage of sanctification, I still need to remember every 15 minutes that He is my only source of confidence.  But I would like to FEEL competent. I would like to know that I can do this French-teacher thing.

If you know me via this blog or in person, you know that I teach French via a method that is intuitive, creative, student-affirming and effective (TPRS™ – Teaching Proficiency through Reading and Storytelling). But it’s hard!  No hiding behind a text book or worksheets.  I compare it to being a stand-up comedienne who depends on a good audience to feed her energy and material in such a way that a symbiotic relationship develops that is satisfying to all.  When it’s good, it’s very, very good.  But when there is no energy in the room, or when I, the comedienne/teacher don’t read the students well and go too fast or jump around, it’s discouraging to me (and probably confusing to them!)

I take their learning and progress, their enjoyment and confidence very personally because I am always comparing myself to the ‘experts’ in my field. These are the ones I watch at conferences and those whose advice and experiences I read daily.

Okay, enough of my professional woes.  I want to share with you how I am talking to myself.  The Bible gives us the example of David, “…who encouraged himself in the Lord” – 1 Sam 30:6.  What a great line. While living in Ziklag, an outpost in the boondocks, with his band of men and their families the Amalekites had attacked.  Women, children and livestock were carted away while David and his men were serving with the Philistines.  We learn of David’s reaction as he and the men discover the sacking of their families.

How dire was David’s situation?  Very! Not only had his wives and kids been kidnapped by the nasty Amalekites, his men turned to stone him, their leader. It was he they blamed.   David’s faith is tested and his reaction is amazing!  Faith is vindicated.  His reaction is worthy of emulating.  No time for a pity-party.

Yet I do believe that David was no Pollyanna.  If he ‘encouraged’ himself, that is because he was fighting internal discouragement and fear, just like we do.

Life is challenging and overwhelming at times. We get down, but we are not meant to stay there!  What we say to ourselves can really make a difference.

Last Sunday, our pastor was talking about the joy of an assurance of faith and of belonging to Christ.  This is our birth-right as born-again, regenerated children of God.  But we have to rehearse to ourselves the truth of the blessings that come with this new life in Christ. (As one of my students taught me in Latin, repetitio est mater studiorum – thank you Carter Moonis!)

What is our birthright as believers?  These 3 gifts:

  • ·         Forgiveness of our sins.  This is HUGE.  We are born into a world where the wrath of God is on us from the beginning.  Without Christ’s work on the cross, we would have to face God in our sins.  (if you don’t think your sins are bad, try ‘rebellion’ on for size – that heads the list)
  • ·         An assured future with Jesus: We were created to enjoy glorifying God.  Doing so forever will be unbelievably satisfying. (Collect the best moments of your life and multiply them by some gigantic mathematical number)
  • ·         Understanding the big picture:  Call this worldview or the meaning of life.  It’s about understanding and knowing why we were born and our life’s purpose. As Christians, we are equipped with an explanation for suffering (the fall and resulting sin).  But we are equally blessed, living with the assurance that there WILL BE ultimate justice, that all wrongs will be righted in the end.  (Spoiler alert – read the Book of Revelation)

Sooo?  How does that help with our anxieties today?    How does remembering our birthright make a difference in the gritty trenches? Maybe it’s just about relaxing, continually talking to God and giving things over to Him as we do our daily work with the strength and wisdom He provides.  In, around and through that work, we are to practice contentment with His gifts and love others to the best of ability.

And my French classes?  Well, I have to remember that I’ve gotten into the groove in the past; most likely I will again this year.  And before I know it, I will be blogging in May about what a great year I had.  But you can still pray for me!

 

Daily C-Rations and Getting the CAR in gear – a metaphor

May 31, 2011

Maria 1 John, 1 Peter, Deuteronomy, Ephesians, Guilt, John , , , , Leave a comment

I like to simplify doctrine down to mnemonic devices I can easily recall.

The other day I was thinking about what I need to remember, to feed on each morning to reorient myself for the day.  There is something perverse about a night’s sleep.  I tend to lose a correct theology somewhere in the wee hours of the night. I can go to bed being thankful to God and conscious of Him and then wake up in the morning a ‘worldling’ again, living as a functional atheist.  So each morning, I have to RECALL deliberately what is true about God and about me.

The other day, as I was walking and reflecting about how to be more automatic in God-thoughts, the picture of C-rations sprang to mind.  These days, the prepared meals for an Army in the field are called something else, but you know what I mean. I thought about how a soldier might draw his daily C-rats, enough calories and nutrition to provide him with energy for his 24 hour duty period.  Jacob prayed for spiritual C-Rats for his son Asher:

As your days — so shall your strength be.” Deuteronomy 33:26

Being consistent with Moses, I imagined what spiritual C-rations we should draw.  For fun, I came up with lots of C-words to illustrate God’s gifts.  As I ran through some of these God-given daily provisions, I was reminded of what Paul says.

The apostle emphasizes in his letter to the Ephesians that we have been given every spiritual blessing in Christ.  What are some of these daily spiritual ‘C-rats’ issued to us and available for our sustenance?   As His covenantal children, we are entitled to help ourselves to gifts such as Charity, Compassion, Courage, Character, Control over self, Companionship of Christ….you get the idea…think of your own C words.  What is key is that God provides what we will need for the trials and tasks of the day, not more, not less, but just what is necessary.  (Remember how the Hebrews tried to stash some away, “just in case”, but it rotted?)

But life is more than drawing food or getting equipped for the day.  As I was ruminating about my C-rats plan, it dawned on me that there were some daily actions I could embark on first thing in the morning and then with God’s help sustain.  I came up with three and they too begin with the letter C J.  Here’s an acronym – CAR.  C stands for CASTING all my CARES on Jesus, not only as an act of humility (so Peter exhorts us) but also so I don’t have to carry them around.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under God’s mighty hand, that he may lift you up in due     time.  Cast all your anxiety on him because he cares for you. 1 Pet 5: 6-7

If I heave them onto Jesus, He can handle them, fix them, and imbue them with grace.

The A stands for ABIDE.

Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in me.  I am the vine; you are the branches. Whoever abides in me and I in him, he it is that bears much fruit, for apart from me you can do nothing.  John 15: 4-5

Now I must admit, the How-To of abiding is a challenge.  But I heard Andrée Seu (columnist from World magazine) give a simple tip on how to abide.  She recommends thanking God as a method for keeping one’s mind on Christ.  Now that makes sense.  If all of a sudden I ‘wake up’ and realize I haven’t been abiding in Christ, I can look around and thank Him for something right at hand.

Today, I caught myself not even aware of God while on a walk with my husband.  It was Mike’s birthday AND Memorial Day, so we were out enjoying a 5-mile wooded trail.  When I startled and it dawned on me that I wasn’t abiding in (i.e. thinking about) Christ, I looked at the textured bark on the trees and thanked God for His design and creativity (another C word!)   That one observation led to other delights and all of a sudden I was abiding.  My momentary appreciation and love for God grew.

What about guilt for the hours that had passed without thinking of God?  The 3rd letter of CAR reminds us that we get to REPENT each time we catch ourselves distracted about worldly concerns with no thought toward God.  I’m so grateful for the gift of frequent repentance:

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness. 1 John 1:9

Now applying the CAR metaphor a bit further, I imagine an engine with pistons that operates on a continuous 3 stroke cycle (we have to S-T-R-E-T-C-H the analogy a bit, I know! My husband has explained that cars have either 2 or 4 cycles).  I cast my cares on Christ, I abide in Him and when I FORGET about Him I come to my senses. Then I get to repent and thank Him for gently bringing me back to my senses. And so it goes.  The car engine won’t function unless the pistons are moving up and down.  Neither will I function well as a Christian unless I am continually Casting, Abiding, and Repenting.

So what’s the plan when you wake up tomorrow morning? We’ll draw our C-Rats for the day and put the CAR in gear.  Let me know what other C blessings make a difference in your day.

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